Sure, pets have an easy life of soft couches and squeaky toys. But, sometimes, things defy comprehension. Then it’s time to just melt down.
I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender.
I coulda been Garfield.
Look. We’ve been over this. Cool Runnings does not need to be remade as an all-pug spectacular.
Didn’t your mother ever tell you not to play with your food?
To the moon, owner. No, scratch that. To infinity and beyond!
Really, dude? Punk is SO over.
It’s not theoretical physics, man. Just throw the stick.
They can dress me like a freaking hipster, but I am NOT listening to Vampire Weekend. Ever.
Are you stalking me? ARE YOU STALKING ME?
Ever had one of those days where you just can’t get a thing done?
I’m a lover, not a fighter, dammit.
I really, really have to lay off the catnip.
When you can’t beat a dog that’s already on the ground, it’s time to call it a day.
I came out here for the ice cream falling from the sky. Clearly, I was misinformed.
OMG. Now the toys are armed.
Yeah, I’ve been working out. Thanks for noticing.
It’s the day we dreamed of, Fluffy. He’s finally out. What the hell do we do now?
And I was already having trouble processing “Where does the sun go at night?”
There’s only so much fun a dog can take.
Are you the one drinking all the water when the tap is “off”? I mean, it has to go somewhere.
When I said walkies, I meant WALKIES.
Didn’t you read the script? You fly. I chase. OMG, I hate working with amateurs.
For the last time, just install a cat door. I’m begging you.
Get over yourself, Rex. Just because your parents gave you a car doesn’t make you cool.
I TOLD you. I don’t want to go to school.
Eyes on the road, Fido! Eyes on the ROAD!
Of course I’m mad. You took the margarita and left me with this.
Just wait until I find Angry Birds.
It’s his fault. He was in my way.
It has finally found a way to hunt us without human assistance. Run for your lives!
Overwhelmed with my own cuteness, I must sleep now.
