A guy who really cares about your pleasure, not his ego, will take a back seat and realize his penis will not play the primary role in pleasing you.
I don't distinguish between foreplay and sex. In fact, I sometimes treat intercourse as foreplay. After it, I'm even more excited for my turn.
So start talking to your partner.
For over a hundred years, sex researchers, feminists and pop culture have been enmeshed in an ongoing debate as to which is superior: the vaginal or clitoral orgasm. Regrettably, their high-brow ponderings have left the average gal in their wake wondering whether her orgasm is either real or even the best one.
What does intimacy mean to you? Sexual intimacy is probably the most stereotypical and most familiar definition of the word in modern society. But most people want more than just the act of sex -- they want some depth.