If Toronto Mayor Rob Ford was a client of mine how exactly would I rebrand him for success in the next election? In the end, it comes down to one major factor: What is the major brand challenge that is facing Rob Ford and how do we (his fictional Rob Ford rebrand team) overcome that?

I've decided to make a bold move. I blotted out two hours from my schedule in the middle of the day. I set Outlook for "Out of Office" during these chunks of time and it took about two weeks for everyone who needs to schedule time with me to settle and react. Today I remembered to bring a comb. It's the little things you need to plan for.

So it occurs to me, how does one celebrate a small achievement like losing a pound? There are always a steady stream of stories about people who continue to endure day after day with so much more pain and suffering. And here I am, some schmuck who -- wooptie doo -- lost one freakin' pound.

Get on with the job for which you were elected, Mr. Mayor, and forget gimmicky weight-loss nonsense at which political foes sneer and mock. Save the city money, stand up for taxpayers. Who cares if the mayor is a tubby, addicted to cream puffs and malted milk shakes?