I have been lost for the past few weeks in what seemed like a never ending tangle of work commitments, daughter commitments and frantically yearning for sleep. I went from one extreme to the next. From being home and having no job, but worried about bills which prevented me writing, to working almost every day and having barely even anytime to sleep, much less write.
Let me just say, I love my two new jobs. One job is in the hospice aspect of nursing and the other is in the neonatal ICU. Two opposite views of nursing. I see the beginning and ending of life, and I know in some way this is significant. I know that this is not by accident and it is in preparation for something, but what, I don't know. I just know that things don't happen like this for no reason. God obviously has a plan; I just wish He let me in on it. I love the diversity of the people where I work. The camaraderie among my fellow nurse colleagues is inspiring. They are always there with a helping hand and encouraging word. Everyone loves working there and good vibes are strong for making the workplace bearable.
But I do miss writing. I miss having time to think and just having my energy flow. I am not centered or balanced, but oddly feel like all this crazy is part of the plan. I know I am in the midst of a lesson; I am aware of that. I believe I am supposed to learn to juggle the jobs I need to have with love for my passion and become adept at balancing both for a good quality of life. I just haven't mastered the balancing yet. I hope I do soon.