Pump Up Your Smartphone
This might be the only way you can get him to put down his phone during your romantic dinner. If he complains? Tell him if the shoe fits...
What Jerry McGuire Meant To Say
Few gifts straddle the no man's land between romance and porn. This is one of them. He'll burst out laughing but good luck getting him to wear it.
What's so funny about this 150-page book? Every page is blank! Penis connoisseurs will appreciate "the truth well told," but the true laughs start when your friends pick up the book from your coffee table.
The Good: He has no teeth, doesn't care if you roll over after you've pleasured yourself and doesn't snore. The Bad: He'll ignore your texts, never call and you can never bring him home to meet mom and dad.
Put the frog in a cup. Add water and poof! A poofter! Who knew that the only thing standing between you and Mr. Right was a little H2O? Travel advisory: Don't drink the water.
We love this gift but one misplaced chocolate chip in that tableau and oh dear, there goes your appetite.
What a dynamic duo you guys are! Perfect that Teacher-student, Daddy-Twink, Master-Sub vibe you might have going on.
The author recently published his latest, Book Of Things Better Than Dick.