For BRIDES, by Jillian Kramer.
You spent months or even years planning out the perfect day. So when a single, solitary detail goes awry, your gut instinct is to sweat it — or worse. As Jaclyn Fisher, owner of Two Little Birds Planning in Philadelphia explains, "couples expect for the wedding day to go exactly as planned, so therefore even small things that may not bother them any other time will seem huge on the big day." But that being said, our experts promise these 10 things are nothing to sweat on the big day. After all, you've got enough to worry about.
1. You're running a little late. So your family portraits were supposed to start at 3 p.m. on the dot, but it's 3:05 p.m. and you haven't yet made your way through the church door. You can stop checking your watch, however. "Your planner padded your timeline to account for some things running a little behind," explains Fisher, "so don't panic if you're starting photos 10 minutes after you were supposed to."
2. Your vendor is running late. It's not exactly an ideal situation when your cake is stuck in traffic. "But it happens," says Aviva Samuels, owner of Kiss the Planner in Palm Beach, Fla. "If they can hustle to make up for lost time, and they're smiling, and in the groove by the time that your guests first interact with them, then there's no real damage done. Unless you want to freak out and cause yourself unnecessary stress, the only damage you would be doing is the damage you'd be doing to yourself over it."
3. You know you blinked for that last photo. You want to look perfect on your wedding day, but "couples should not worry about looking perfect in every photo," says Fisher. "Thousands of shots will be taken by your photographer, and he or she will only deliver a few hundred edited photos. That means you're getting the best photos that were taken, and you'll never even see the ones with your eyes closed."
4. Your centerpieces look nothing like what's on your Pinterest board. If your centerpieces miss the Pinterest mark, take a deep breath and remember that while you know what they were supposed to look like, your guests have no clue. "As a general rule of thumb, fresh flowers in any color, shape, or style are beautiful," says Samuels. And while you have a right to be upset that what was promised wasn't delivered, she says, "is it really worth getting aggravated over?"
5. You fear your friend is about to give an embarrassing toast. Try as you might, you can't control what comes out of another person's mouth. "You can ask them to keep it positive, but you can't control whether or not they respect your wishes," points out Fisher. "So if a toast takes a bad turn, shake it off, move on, and get back to enjoying your day."
6. Your DJ goes rogue. Let's say he plays the wrong song for your first dance. Or, "when everyone is up, dancing, and having fun, he threw a curve ball, played a song that bombed, and it cleared out the dance floor," describes Samuels. "Sure, he may have made a big faux pas. And it might have been a real doozy. But it's done. And it's still not the end of the world. It's still a wonderful wedding and the mistake will long forgotten by everyone there, and hopefully even you."
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7. You checked the weather forecast — and it's not good. You've made a rain plan and checked it twice. Just make sure you love Plan B — and Plan C and Plan D — as much as you love Plan A, says Fisher. Because if you do, "you won't need to worry about what Mother Nature brings on your wedding day," she explains.
8. Your ceremony music is off. So your pianist is supposed to hit the high notes just as you walk down the aisle, but she starts the crescendo long before you've taken your first step. "That's not how it was supposed to go," admits Samuels, "but does anyone really know that, and does it really matter? I bet all they were thinking is how beautiful the melody was, how happy your loved ones seemed, and how stunning you looked."
9. You haven't had time to talk to every guest. Whether you're making the rounds at dinner or mingling during cocktail hour, realize you may unintentionally miss some people — and that's OK. "Your friends and family will understand," assures Fisher. "Just do your best and don't let it take the focus away from having fun."
10. You tasted the chicken, and it's dry. Or maybe the rice was cold. Whatever the problem, "you tasted it just the month before and it was perfect, and now it isn't," describes Samuels. "But your guests are surrounding you, having a wonderful time and feeling your joy as they see and feel your wedded bliss. They aren't nearly as critical as you are. They didn't come for the food, they came for you. That part of course was perfect, and happily, they got what they wanted."
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