Food & Drink

13 Food Wisdoms To Live By, According To Ron Swanson

His most valuable lessons on meat, alcohol and even strip clubs

"Parks and Recreation's" Ron Swanson is a capitalist proponent, carpenter extraordinaire and food enthusiast. Through the show's first six seasons, he's spread his love for steak and bacon while shunning vegans, vegetables and all things green or healthy. So here's a look at Ron Swanson's most valuable lessons on meat, alcohol and even strip clubs.

1. Skim milk is for the birds

2. Fake bacon is garbage bacon

3. Only go to strip clubs with breakfast buffets

5. Avoid vegetables at all costs

4. Fish is also a vegetable

6. There's no such thing as too much

7. The one place in Europe worth visiting is Scotland, "where God's chosen elixirs are distilled, barreled and prepared for consumption"

8. Always go for the party size

9. You don't need surf 'n' turf when you can have steak on steak on cigars

10. Real men avoid vodka

11. You're still a "meat virgin" until you've grilled

12. There IS a wrong way to consume alcohol

13. Don't judge a book by its cover

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