You love to give gifts, right? It feel ah-mazing in your heart to give, to surprise someone, and to do or say something meaningful to someone you love.
But how comfortable are you with receiving gifts? How about compliments? If you're anything like I used to be- it was so exciting to give! I just loved surprising people, even if it was with a super heart-felt card. But receiving? Not so much. I was a terrible at receiving gifts. I would spend so much time saying things like: that's sweet but you shouldn't have done that, wow- thank you! (mixed with complete embarrassment and no eye contact), or I would completely fumble over my words and wish the entire ordeal was over with already.
I didn't mind receiving when I worked for it or when everyone else had what they wanted, but I just didn't feel deserving of a gift.
Then I realized that I was actually hurting people by not taking their gifts with grace and gratitude. I was hurting their feelings by denying my worthiness to accept the gift. Not only that, I was telling the world "don't send me gifts because I don't know how the heck to receive them!!" That is definitely NOT the message that I want to send out there.
Though I'm far from perfect, I'm happy to say that I have become much more gracious when I accept gifts now. What should you do when someone gives you a gift, compliment, or helps you?
1.Take your attention off of yourself- this is not about you. This kind person loves you and wanted you to have something. It doesn't matter if you asked for it. It doesn't matter if you think you deserve it. What matters is that you honor the person that gifted it to you.
You know how awesome you feel when you give a gift? Believe it or not- they want the same thing! They want to surprise you with something meaningful that you wanted or with something that they wanted you to have (this includes compliments!). Usually, you don't just give something just for the heck of it. You give something because of the meaning behind it, because you love someone, or because you saw something that you knew they would love and you wanted them to have it!
So- don't steal their thunder! They want you to have something and they want to feel good about themselves, too! In that moment, stop thinking about you. It's about them and what they wanted for you. They want to experience giving you a gift. They want to feel exactly how you want to feel when you give a gift- so make sure you allow that!
2. Say thank you and feel the warmth and gratitude in your heart- really, that person wanted you to have a gift. They wanted to give you something because they love you. Don't focus on the gift. Don't think about whether you purchased something comparable. Don't think about whether they could afford it. Don't think about whether or not you deserve it. Don't feel inadequate for a gift. Just. say. thank. you. and give a hug- when appropriate. :)
There is no need to feel guilty about receiving a gift. Love and cherish the one who gave it to you and enjoy! You ARE deserving of a gift- you are AMAZING! Own that and allow them to feel good, too.
April Julson is a life coach for senstive women who are ready to drop the emotional baggage and live a more joyful life. April is passionate about kindness, compassion, and freedom. For thought-provoking topics and inspiration. visit April online or on Facebook.