20 Thought-Provoking Conversation Starters for Couples

Asking great questions always leads to better conversations. However, from my experience, coming up with meaningful and engaging conversation starters to discuss as a couple can be difficult.

But don’t worry! The good news is that you don't have to go looking for questions.

Because below are 20 conversation starters you can discuss with your partner, significant other, or spouse on your next date night, road trip, or bonfire.

These conversation starters have helped my wife and l to have deeper and more meaningful conversations.

20 Thought-provoking conversation starters for couples

1. What makes you uncomfortable when talking about sex?

2. When do you feel respected by me?

  • When do you feel disrespected by me?

3. Do you feel unworthy of my love?

4. What do you do to get yourself in a better mood when you are not feeling great?

5. What does the perfect relationship look like to you?

  • What is our relationship missing to be “perfect”?

6. What are the top five things you appreciate about me?

7. Do you have trouble opening up and talking to me about anything?

  • Do you find it difficult feeling intimate with me in any form?
  • Are you worried about being hurt?
  • Are there any secrets you have kept from me?
  • Is there any subject you feel is too personal to talk to me about?
  • What is something about you that you feel I don’t need to know? Why?
  • What makes you not want to talk to me?

8. What makes you feel heard and understood when we communicate?

  • What distracts you from giving your undivided attention to me?
  • When do you feel you have my full attention?
  • Describe what "giving my full attention" to you means.

9. How are you learning and growing as an individual?

10. Do you feel appreciated by me?

  • What could I do to make you feel more appreciated?
  • When was the last time you felt appreciated by me?

11. Tell me about a challenge you’ve had in your life.

  • What are you grateful for, as a result of experiencing that hardship, and what did you learn?

12. What would you do if you find yourself attracted to another person and entertain thoughts of cheating?

13. What do you define as cheating emotionally?

  • Cheating physically?

14. Is there anything I do that causes you to question my love for you?

15. What does satisfying sex mean to you?

  • Is our sex life satisfying to you? Why?
  • Is our sex life unsatisfying in any way?

16. How can we make our relationship affair-proof?

17. How do you feel about supporting family members financially?

18. Do you think that not having enough money is a good reason not to have children?

  • How much money do you think is ideal before someone has children?

19. What do you love most about our relationship?

20. What is one thing that is missing in our relationship?

Have a great conversation this week

Choose the questions that you know will be great conversation starters for your relationship and discuss them with your partner, significant other, or spouse. These questions will help you will feel intimately connected, build trust, and get to know each other more deeply.

Together with his amazing wife, Marcus helps newlyweds adjust to married life, and inspires married couples to become better husbands and wives.

He hosts the First Year Marriage Show podcast and co-authored three best-selling marriage books with his wife.

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