Warning: Spoilers coming at you fast and furious below.
The “Fast and the Furious” franchise lives its life one impossible moment at a time.
“Fate of the Furious,” the eighth and newest installment, is no different. The first one without Paul Walker seems like it might strike a somber note in the series, but thanks to The Rock’s one-liners, a rogue Vin Diesel and a submarine, “Fate” fits right in with this family of movies.
“Fate of the Furious” doesn’t outshine “Furious 7.” In fact, it seemingly ignores major plot points from the previous film. But it makes for an enjoyable ride if you don’t think about it. So don’t think about it!
Since the franchise is known for being over-the-top, here are five of the most unnecessary or ridiculous moments from “Fate of the Furious” that are also just so necessary.
1. The moment everyone forgets Jason Statham’s character is a mass murderer.
Does anyone remember “Furious 7”? Jason Statham’s character, Shaw, starts the movie by murdering a bunch of people at a hospital. He’s also the person who killed Han (Sung Kang) in the series.
Don’t worry, though. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson remembers ... for a while.
The two actors are pit against each other for a good part of the movie until Johnson’s character, Hobbs, tells Shaw he’s gonna punch his teeth so far down his throat he’ll need to put a toothbrush up his butt to clean them. Or something to that effect.
Shaw laughs. Hobbs laughs. All murders are forgiven.
OK, maybe not “all” murders are forgiven ― Shaw committed a lot of murders ― but Hobbs shows concern for him later, indicating his change of heart.
Yes, it’s a bit baffling. Yes, it needs to happen.
2. When The Rock redirects a torpedo with his hand.
A talked-about moment from the “Fate” trailers, and a standout one from the film, comes when The Rock redirects a torpedo with nothing but his hand.
If you consider things like, you know, the laws of physics, this seems unbelievable.
Well, believe it. In fact, we even asked The Royal Navy over Twitter if this would be plausible, and Hobbs himself chimed in:
Never question The Rock.
The Royal Navy was so impressed that it reached out and requested The Rock’s services. So it must be true.
3. When Scott Eastwood smashes a car key case with a crowbar.
This seems minor, but it’s perhaps the most unnecessary moment from the entire movie.
Scott Eastwood’s character, called “Little Nobody,” is the new kid on the block ― the verbal and literal punching bag for the main crew at the beginning of the film. Inevitably, there is a turning point, which comes when he smashes a glass case holding a bunch of car keys.
This doesn’t need to happen. If you want some car keys, you can probably just open the case and take them out nicely.
Little Nobody, though, doesn’t do that. With a one-liner he could’ve stolen from any kindergartener, he proclaims there to be no rules and smashes the case with a crowbar.
It seems uncalled for, but everyone’s into it, so we’ll allow it.
4. Every other Vin Diesel moment.
Writing this story went something like: “Oh, and then Vin Diesel does that! Oh, wait, remember, then he does that, too!”
Rather than list out every overblown (but amazing) thing done by Vin Diesel’s character, Dom, we’re grouping them all into one.
For instance, take the moment when Dom and Cipher (Charlize Theron) kiss in front of Letty (Michelle Rodriguez). Like Eastwood smashing the glass case, this absolutely doesn’t need to happen. Cipher and Dom can just leave, given his romantic past with Letty. It also doesn’t really have any implications later. But it is so necessary.
Also, at one point during a street race, Dom’s car catches fire. As if that wasn’t enough, he has to drive it backwards ― and still wins.
If you’re losing to someone driving in those conditions, you should really think about your life choices.
5. The “Lion King” scene.
We were actually going to leave this one out ― if it weren’t for an incredibly spoiler-y clip released this week:
It’s a good thing we all forgot about Shaw’s murders, or else we couldn’t enjoy the best scene of the whole movie: Jason Statham fighting an airplane full of people while taking care of a baby.
Later, the baby is involved in a very “Lion King” moment that had us just waiting for the classic line: “Everything the light touches is our kingdom.”
But, hey, hakuna matata. It just makes “F8” even more “Gr8.”
“Fate of the Furious” speeds into theaters April 14.