Why design yourself? Maybe you don't need to, but there may be some of us who feel we've evolved from one season to the next and we're clueless as to where we want to go. Maybe we know where we want to go but don't know how to get there. Together, let's build a plan that will help us grow as women, as business owners, moms, wives, daughters, sisters, and friends. Let's start with being happy.
Live in the Moment!
In this world where we move at Mach 2 with our hair on fire, we typically don't live in the moment. I can go for a walk to relax, but spend my time creating a mental "to do" list. My husband used to say to me two hours before work, "Yup! She's got her work face on!" I had no idea, I was already in work mode and missing the fact that I had a handsome naked guy standing in the shower with me. I have to embrace this concept daily because I'm so used to multi-tasking.
Be Flexible and Resilient!
The dictionary defines resilient as springing back; rebounding, returning to the original form or position after being bent, compressed, or stretched. LOL! How many of us can say we do that? Or that we do that well? I start off my day with a plan, goals, etc., and rarely does my day go that way. Learning to be resilient not only keeps my frustrations low, it helps me live in the moment, enjoy who or what interrupted my schedule, and return to the plan when I am able to.
Remaining calm can actually keep your workload down as well as lessen your stress levels. It takes great reined-in strength to respond rather than react to people and situations. Keeping calm sounds so easy to do, but in reality will test your maturity, experience, wisdom, and tongue-biting ability. But the results of staying calm far outweigh the effort.
Be Good to Yourself
If airlines remind you that in an emergency you need to place your oxygen masks on first then place it on others, there's a reason for it. We are no good to anyone else if we aren't first good to ourselves. Taking time out to walk, absorb sunshine, sit quietly, read a book, get a haircut, do your nails, spend time with a friend, and try out a new lipstick are self-restoring. Never underestimate the value of a good workout, pretty new underwear, sweet tea, a day without the normal chores, and a good massage. I make it a rule to stop work at noon on Fridays and play for several hours with a girlfriend. I'm better for it and everyone in my circle of influence gets a better me to deal with.
There's great value in periodically doing nothing. I've had days when I lie on the couch and watch back-to-back Hallmark shows for hours! I don't get out of my pjs, and I only eat when I'm hungry. Did you know that in some countries, the more responsibility a leader has, the larger their garden is? There is value in sitting, quieting your mind. Don't let idleness get interpreted as laziness. It is wise for a warrior to retreat from the battle once in a while to reassess the battle. You are a warrior for many others in your life; take time to do nothing.
We often seek happiness outside of ourselves. We invest our hearts and time in jobs, looks, pleasing others, and always striving forward. There are times for those things to be priorities, but be careful that they don't fall to your "seeking happiness" lifestyle. True happiness cannot be determined by others, circumstances, money, dress size, awards, or status. If it can be taken away, it isn't true happiness.
True happiness is a state of being content. If you're not content, ask yourself why and make a plan to change. If you are content, ask yourself why and do more of that. Again, happiness is not outside yourself. Stop chasing the false things we believe make us happy. Here's a tip: If you can hold it in your hands, it's not happiness. If one day your heart is bursting and you can't put words to it... that's your heart experiencing joy, the boss of happiness.