As I visited my family over the holidays, I got a little grumpy. The tree cover around my parent's house was blocking satellite radio. I know, first world irritations. But there is nothing worse when you're grooving to (fill in your favorite song here) and it goes to fuzz. As the week went on, as I came to the area where the reception was bad, I turned off the radio. I just drove. I enjoyed the views. I waved to people. By the end of the trip, I looked forward to the quiet. It got me thinking.
Silence is now a commodity. We are surrounded by pings, beeps, and noise. If we get the sounds of nature, it's because we make room for them. The modern technological world is not the world we need to pause and be. A world without quiet creates a life without peace. But we have more options to find stillness than most of us realize. Where are we missing places to enjoy a little more silence?
First, it's time to reclaim the front stoop. Most of us come home from work and turn on the TV. We have our headphones in all the time and we are constantly on the phone or listening to music. When we are in the house, there is always activity, noise, and commotion. That's not wrong, and I started something new this fall. I started sitting on the porch when I got home. It was either my second 12-minute sit for the day or sometimes, the first time I got to slow down. I just sat. I looked at the hills. I listened to whatever kids, creatures, or quiet emerged. The back yard, side yard, screen porch, or local park: Where can you just sit like our grandparents used to on the front porch in their rocking chairs?
Second, and this one may surprise you: church. Spiritual communities you pass every day of every faith, not to mention chapels at schools, universities, and hospitals, are almost always empty. The spiritual community I lead has one of the classic sanctuaries in America. It is busy around five hours a week. That leaves dozens of hours where the church is open and a safe, quiet place is begging to be savored. When I was a hospital chaplain, if I had a break, the interfaith chapel was almost always empty. In college, I loved reading in historic chapel, surrounded by stone and silence. What sacred space do you pass every day that is unused and begging to give you quiet sanctuary?
Third, and this is only kind of meant to be humorous: the bathroom. The moms and dads with young kids I take care of constantly tell stories about locking the door to the bathroom for a few minutes alone in the shower. The shower is not a time to ruminate and worry; it is your chance to lean back into the warm water and enjoy silence. A bath may be the most undervalued quiet time in the world. Pick a night when the family is gone and let the bubbles and serenity take you away. Can you make your unused bathtub or time in the morning an intentional gift of quiet?
Fourth, the library is a dying institution and we can bring it back for meditative reasons. E-readers make libraries less and less necessary. And, libraries are the ancient place where wisdom was found. Now, it is one of the quiet places that remains quiet. In your town, pop by and just sit with a paper or magazine or plop down in the stacks like you used to in college and read a bit. Don't forget to just sit in the space too. Most libraries are beautiful and all of them have quiet corners with your name on them. Where is your local library that would love you to visit?
Finally, town hall. In most cities and towns there is an auditorium for big meetings and rallies. Like sanctuaries, they are rarely used. Many government buildings have amazing benches and gardens too. In an era of political rancor, isn't it a graceful idea to enjoy our civic spaces for their unexpected quiet. Where is the closest public institution with an unused area waiting for you to let the world dissolve and the quiet feed your soul?
We need quiet because it reminds our brains that the chaos of the world doesn't have to be our reality. Sure, there are moments where you need to feel excited or stressed. There are absolutely parts of every day that need your focus and attention. And silence is what resets our being so that we recognize we don't have to get as burdened by life as most of us tend to feel.
Oh, and don't forget the car. It is the easiest place to enjoy the hum of the engine and nothing else. Tunes and talk radio are great; and no one can bother you in the car if you enjoy the quiet. Find one of these places each day and in a few weeks or months, you will be a calmer, happier person. Your friends will ask what's different about you. Just make sure they know how to be quiet if you tell them about your new secret spaces.
