5 Things I Wish I Had Known When I Graduated College

5 Things I Wish I Had Known When I Graduated College
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Dear Class of 2016,

Congratulations! After 4 years of hard work, you have your degree and are making your way into the "real world." Your time in school has undoubtedly served you in many ways. You have made friendships that will last a lifetime and have the skills to excel in the workforce.

But as you will soon learn, life isn't about what you want to "do." It's about who you want to "be." That isn't something that can be taught in a lecture hall.

Here are 5 things I've learned since graduation that can help you avoid feelings of resentment, sadness, and self-rejection as you travel your path:


1. Your parents aren't superheroes
. I realize that "honor thy father and mother" is one of the ten commandments, but your mom and dad were making s**t up as they went along just like everyone else. As kids, it's natural to put your parents on a pedestal like Batman and Wonder Woman, but the truth is that they are flawed. They had, and probably still have, moments of selfishness, insecurity, and anger. They undoubtedly made some bad choices that affected you in a negative way... but be kind to them anyways. This doesn't mean you have to approve of everything they have said or done. If they violated your trust in an egregious way, you aren't even required to maintain a relationship with them as an adult. However, holding a space of compassion and forgiveness for them will allow you to be kind to yourself when you make mistakes in your life.

And you will make a LOT of mistakes. But this leads to the next point.

2. There is no such thing as failure. There are only lessons learned. As you go out into the world, you will get knocked down. Your dreams won't always work out the way you want. You will get fired from a job. You will love someone deeply and get hurt. Some people will tell you that you aren't good enough, talented enough, attractive enough, smart enough, etc. Yet, the only rejection that can truly destroy you happens when you reject yourself.

The potholes in the road are there by design. They are there to teach you a lesson. In fact, pain will be your greatest teacher in life. When you experience a setback, don't get caught up in wishing things had worked out differently. Just ask "what do I need to learn from this?" Do you need to learn to better follow your instincts? Do you need to set better boundaries? Do you need to learn to be vulnerable?

Be humble. Learn the lesson.

If you don't, the universe has a way of repeatedly smacking you in the face with the lesson until you do.

3. College has provided you with the tools to be "successful." The piece of paper that you have spent 6-figures on will open a lot of doors for you. It will be your golden ticket to lots of interviews with companies who will give you a paycheck and an opportunity to work your way up the corporate ladder. As a result, you will be well positioned to buy a home, a nice car, and provide for a family. Yes, you can be wildly successful in life. But there's a catch.

4. That success doesn't always equal fulfillment. Money is awesome. I love money. But if you are making it in a way that feels inauthentic to your core values, then you will feel like you live an inauthentic life. The highest levels of joy happen by living your purpose and bringing your best self to the world each day, not from buying the things our culture wants you to believe will make you your best self.

5. That whole "living your purpose" thing is hard. It means you are putting your true self out there, rather than the manicured, filtered version that you portray on social media. It means some people will judge you. Your family might not agree with your vision and want you to do something that's "safe." Living your purpose will trigger every insecurity, fear of rejection, and self-worth issue that you have.

But that's the point. Your purpose will force you to grow into the kind of person that you need to be in order to live your dream. Embrace that fear and realize it's a friend, not a foe. 99% of the friends around you will compromise themselves and settle for something safe. Be courageous. Be different. Be open to the highs and the lows. Just be you.

It's never too late to find your life purpose and live your dream. Dan Mason has coached clients in 5 countries to help them live a life of confidence, fulfillment, and joy. Go to www.creativesoulcoaching.net to schedule your FREE, 25-minute Creative Breathrough Coaching session today!

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