Being you. That's one thing only you can forsake. It's easy to lose yourself in a world that pummels you with ceaseless messages on who you "should be," but your authentic self is what guides you to your passion and purpose, happiness, self-empowerment, and to one of the fundamental aspirations of the human experience: Receive and give love unconditionally. Here are five tips that will help you return to the real you and stay true to who you are meant to be.
Tip #1: Understand that, as a human, you are a pack animal, and by nature, you have a strong desire to belong to a pack. Don't start howling at the moon just yet, but know that there are two ways to gain pack acceptance. On one hand, you can conform to pack expectations, or you can earn your way into the pack by contributing something meaningful to it. When you do this, you are free to use your own inner compass to navigate your way through life, and this allows you to keep your authentic power.
Tip #2: If you decide to earn your way then that means you need to discover what unique contribution you can offer to the pack. So tip #2 is a two-part process: first listen to your heart and head to learn what your inner voice is telling you about your interests and passions. Then the second part requires courage because it takes being emotionally honest with yourself to even do the first part of listening.
One practice is to have a heart-to-heart conversation with your inner voice, asking it some tough questions such as: "What do I naturally love to do? What am I curious about? How do I want to contribute?" Check in with your self on a regular basis and start learning what makes you excited, tapping into your natural abilities.
Tip #3: The path to the authentic you means showing people your true colors--being open and vulnerable with them. Contrary to what most people assume, vulnerability can be a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. But you can't just roll over and expose your tender underbelly to the razor sharp fangs of others. You have to set healthy and reasonable boundaries for people by letting them know what you consider to be acceptable behavior and what you don't.
And showing your true colors also means taking an honest look at our flaws, real or imagined, that get in the way of our being grounded in our authentic self, but instead of sweeping them under the rug and ignoring your weaknesses, make a list of them! Yes, a real, tangible list. Then take each one and figure out how it can help you grow by using compassion and some humility. Once you embrace your flaws and define their value, you can be grateful for the amazing and unique being you are. Remember to be respectful of your whole self and honor those choices that keep you true to who you are. If it helps, find a mantra that will keep you consciously aware of the importance of being you like, "I am; I accept; I love."
Tip #4: All of this emotional honesty requires that you tap into your heart before you tap into your brain. Feel first; think second. Most of us do this the other way around. We think a thought, and then that elicits an emotional response, which then produces a reaction. Logic does have its place, but start by examining your intuition and feelings, and once you identify these, then you can let your brain analyze away.
Tip #5: Once you brazenly wave that "You" flag to the world, you can surround yourself with your natural tribe of people who accept you as you are. If for any reason competition, rivalry, comparison or judgment enters into a relationship, work it out, and if you can't, say adios and move along.
Follow these five tips, and you will gain your authentic power back, you will become aware of your life's purpose and pursue it with passion. You won't be at the mercy of others pulling your strings, and you will find true happiness and, most important, love.
An internist in Houston for over thirty years, since her son, Erik's, suicide in 2009, Dr. Elisa Medhus retired her practice and has written a book about her continuing relationship with him, My Son and the Afterlife: Conversations from the Other Side (October 2013) and has created a blog, channelingerik.com, that has over 30,000 subscribers and over 250,000 hits per month. Erik has written his own channeled book My Life After Death: A Memoir from Heaven (September 2015). In it, he describes, in great detail, his own death, his afterlife and his "life" as a spirit.
Subscribe to their Facebook Page, Channeling Erik.