What do you do whenever everyone else's life seems perfect and yours doesn't? I have a close friend who has hit one of life's many speed bumps in her marriage and family. She recently sent us a note to say one of the reasons she takes breaks from social media is because it literally makes her depressed to see other people's accomplishments, happy families, and happy lives online. Then she stated if she posted anything at all it would say... "well today I accomplished getting out of the bed and facing the day!" She went on to say that she's slowly learning to not compare her life to others nor be competitive, but like most of us, it's a work in progress.
My first reaction was PLEASE DO NOT believe anything you are reading on social media, at least not in its entirety. But who am I kidding! My life may not have hit a speedbump like hers, at least not today, but as a single 30-something entrepreneur, where society tells me I'm supposed to be married with two kids by now, I do the SAME thing! A great day of business wins, good times with the girls, and a little me time can quickly turn into "what's wrong with me?" if I don't catch my thoughts after a few minutes of scrolling through my timeline of today's most recent announcements.
The truth of the matter is how often do we post what's "really" going on in our lives? Never. The majority of time we all simply post our highlight reel but never the days where our insecurities have gotten the best of us or we really wanted to throw the spouse we brag on everyday out of the window. Instead we opt to post the cute date night picture from the night before with the hashtag #aboutlastnight.
So just in case you find yourself starting to quickly spiral downhill after reading about and listening to your girlfriends seemingly perfect lives online, many of whom you probably haven't talked to since high school anyway, here are:
5 Ways to Get Over Your Facebook Friend's Perfect Life!
1. Be Realistic
Yes, others in your network may have something you desire in life right now, a spouse, a baby, a new contract, a new promotion or are just returning from a great vacation, but at the end of day despite what it looks like, no one's life is perfect. Fantasizing about someone else's life only drains us of the energy we need to change our own.
2. Be Transparent
While you get frustrated because you can't seem to keep it all together like the other moms or you're not going out on your second date for the week, the other 75 percent of the world would much rather relate to your transparency of what life is really like than they would your portrait of perfection like most share.
3. Be Thankful
We can so often concentrate on the things that we don't have or that we desire to be different in our lives that eventually that is all we see. What we focus and meditate on is what we get. Make a conscious decision to practice gratitude every day, especially when you want to focus on the imperfections in your life.
4. Take a Break
Do like my friend did above and take a break! Take a break from the thing that is magnifying the seemingly imperfections in your life! Whether it's social media, tv, or even friends, create space in your day and calendar to focus on and do the things that bring you energy.
5. Take Control of Your Life
Make sure that before you go into your next spiral of, "Why not me? Why not now?" you assess, "Am I doing everything I can to change what I'm about to complain about? What do I own in this situation?"
Lastly remember, the same life we sometimes get frustrated with is absolutely perfect to someone else who desires the same exact things that you already have! The person with the perfect life is the one who has learned to enjoy the life that she already has!