A retail bonanza for a Hallmark holiday, Valentine's Day is a glaring reminder to those not coupled up in our couples oriented culture that you're minus one. The preponderance of messaging suggests that you need to hurry up and find someone or you'll be the third wheel forever.
Finding love can happen at any time in your life, though.
I submit that Valentine's Day is more than being part of a couple and romance. It's about acknowledging people who matter in your life.
I advocate celebrating one's singledom on the heart holiday that finds you not alone - but, rather single. Being single, after all, is not a disease. It's a state of relationship.
It's important to own where you are and be proud of who you are and where you are.
Relish in your single relationship status because it doesn't mean that you'll be single tomorrow.
I want to encourage you to contemplate why you're in the best place as a single person this Valentine's Day and celebrate you with one or all of these ways.
1. Magnify the good in your life by having a gratitude list. Keeping a list of the gifts you have in your life helps to focus on what you do have versus what you don't have. Good health, a supportive circle of friends, a rewarding career are all things for which one can be grateful.
2. Throw a party! Invite friends over for wine and appetizers or Champagne and dessert. Make it a theme party suggesting, perhaps, everyone wear pink or red. Have a Secret Cupid -- like a Secret Santa -- and pick silly or meaningful gifts to exchange.
3. Indulge yourself. Give yourself credit for how amazing you are and treat yourself to something special like a spa day, a new piece of jewelry or a salon blow-out.
4. Find an opportunity to do good for others. Giving to others usually pulls us out of a funk. Consider volunteering at a senior citizen home, animal shelter or soup kitchen. Scientists believe that altruistic behavior releases endorphins in the brain, producing the positive feeling known as the "helper's high."
5. Send Valentine's Day cards in the mail or email to close friends and family. You can go as fancy or as simple as you like. I personally hand deliver my cards to my nieces and nephew who live close to me. They look forward to getting the sheets of peel off stickers that I include in their cards every year.
6. Round up some friends to hit the local karaoke bar, bowling lanes or an improv comedy show. Revel in your ability to have fun, no men needed.
7. Embrace your singleness. Write down the benefits of being single like no compromises at home, freedom to come and go as you please, fewer responsibilities or no snoring partner sleeping next to you.
8. Get physical. It's a great day for a run in the park or hiking a new trail. If there's a new activity that you've been wanting to try like yoga, pilates or bar method, there's no time like the present to make it happen.
9. Find out what you want. Think about what you want out of life or in your next relationship. Go within; meditate. Journaling can be cathartic also.
It's important to find things that make you happy. Whether it's being with good friends, getting outside, exercise or learning something new. All of these things are necessary to living your best life first to find your best partner.
Then when you are in a relationship you'll be coming from a place of strength and empowerment instead of loneliness and despair.
I love the life I am living now. Happy Valentine's Day!