A Dad's Message to His Cyber-Baby and The World

Dear Indigo,

You are all of 2 years-old and may not yet comprehend all of the things I am about to share with you.

First off, there will never be any secrets between us, and you will be aware of the many wonderful truths that make the fabulous little being that is YOU.

You will always know that your Mommy and Daddy were not like most Mommies and Daddies.

That they were platonic friends who met in Cyber-space in hopes of having you in their lives.

They made you from the contents of a plastic cup and 9 months later you appeared.

Other Mommies and Daddies make their babies in different ways, but just know that you were made with equal portions of love. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Not all children have just one Mommy and a Daddy. Some have a Mommy and a Mommy or a Daddy and a Daddy---there are many combinations of family in our society.

Some Boys like Girls other Boys like Boys and some Girls like Girls.

There is nothing wrong with this, it has always been and will always be.

We are still hopeful that people will stop arguing against this and just accept this human truth. In fact your Daddy is one of the above---a Daddy who likes other Daddies.

If anyone ever teases you in school about this, just ignore them with your extraordinary smile. Just try hard to remember and know that words will never, ever hurt you...I get sensitive and forget this all the time along with where I left my keys.

People will sometimes say mean things. Some might even do so on this very page because the invitation/temptation to reply confuses people. They confuse the word "comment" on the button for the word "attack" and it happens all the time. It's an honest mistake.

That right there is a little thing called sarcasm...your Daddy is full of it.

You see, Sweet Indigo...not everyone is happy in this amazing existence of ours.
And because they are mad and sad they get very excited and happy to push our "buttons" in hopes we could join them in their bad place. Don't let them take away your light with their darkness...just imagine a bubble of light around you...words will bounce right off.

And if you happen to forget the above someday because you let your defense shield down and a kid makes you feel really bad about you or your family---you just tell your daddy and he will show up in his fuzzy pink slippers and scare the bejeezus out of them. In a gentle and loving way, of course.

Sometimes in life you might feel a bit out of place on this vast playground, not accepted and feeling like you're not really belonging to any team. Sometimes your daddy feels this way...not fully being accepted into the gay-daddy world because he has elected to co-parent with a female and not really accepted into the straight parental world because he's a gay-daddy.

So if you should ever feel this way the solution is simple---create your own club, start your own team.

As you go through life, Baby Indigo you will discover some unavoidable truths.
Beautiful, happy things will be experienced along with some very sad ones as well.
This is the Law of the Universe.

You will encounter many things. Joy and heartache, triumph and defeat but always remember that you are strong and that time heals most all wounds.

I wish that you continue to grow healthy and proud of your modern existence.
And as far as our modern family goes--we will not be able to change the minds of many.
Some families, including some that have as many as "19 kids...and counting" (wink) will likely stick to their beliefs.

And you, you should feel free to learn about Buddha and learn about Jesus and learn about the Universe.

Then make your own decision as to what you choose to believe. Just as long as you believe in something.

It's important to be humble in your beliefs and not self-righteous, arrogant and all-knowing because guess what...nobody has all the answers.

Not one human being knows what is truly out there.

It's an old philosopher named Socrates, who you will learn about in school that said,
"As for me, All I know is that I know nothing" and there is astronomical knowledge in accepting that fact. In a perfect world people would be ok believing in different things and still be respectful and loving in their disagreement with each other.

It may be too late for your Daddy and Mommy to see this change in their lifetime but I hope you will see these changes in yours.

Just remember that none of us are perfect. But there is a lot to be said for being honest with yourself.

I myself haven't been the perfect Dad. I am away from you at the moment as I continue to hunt and plant seeds for your future. It has not been an easy road but there is nothing I wouldn't do for you.

Your Daddy is still learning from his inability to learn from past mistakes.

One thing he struggles with is the act of forgiveness.

Baby girl, if you should ever feel down on yourself, you messed up or let someone down, don't be too hard on yourself...forgiveness begins yourself.

There are a lot more life lessons your parents haven't learned yet but maybe through your eyes you could teach them a thing or two.

Maybe you will someday write a letter like this to your own children.

Maybe if we all teach our children, from an early age this simple message of tolerance and acceptance---we could undoubtedly transform this world into a more fantastic place.

With LOVE,



Photo credit: Indigo by Ana Dee Photography

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