THE BLOG

A Letter to My Almost-3-Year-Old

Please stop standing an inch away from the television. You are going to go blind, and I am going to lose my sh*t if I have to ask you to back up even one more time. I promise you will be able to see Angelina Ballerina just fine from the couch.
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Stidio shot of woman with face in birthday cake
Stidio shot of woman with face in birthday cake

Two years ago, as we approached our daughter's first birthday, I wrote a blog post featuring the top 20 things I hoped for her to experience in life. I still want all of those things for her, and many more. That being said, as we approach her third birthday, and the end of two years of pure toddler bliss, I have a short list of things that I also want from her, for myself.

So here we go.

To my sweet, impossible, funny, kind, and "spirited" girl,

Please stop whining. There will be many situations in life that warrant you to be upset. I promise. I've lived through many of them in my own life. Having to use your blue Frozen spoon instead of the purple one is not one of them. It won't kill you. You will survive. I promise.

Please, please, please, start using the potty. My fear is growing every day that you will enter kindergarten with a new lunch box, backpack, and month-long supply of Pampers cruisers. I don't want that for you. You do not want to be "that kid."

Please stop standing an inch away from the television. You are going to go blind and I am going to lose my sh*t if I have to ask you to back up even one more time. I promise you will be able to see Angelina Ballerina just fine from the couch.

Please stop doing the following during dinner: feeding the dog the food you deem inedible, throwing your food on the floor, standing on your chair -- fork in the air -- screaming, running around the kitchen with food in your mouth, and, my personal favorite, pooping under the table (see number 2).

Please stop squirming, kicking, and whining, while I attempt to get you dressed. If it was appropriate for you to leave the house naked, don't you think I would have let you by now? It's not, I checked.

Please continue to be yourself. You are an incredible little human, with a spirit that can't be broken. Keep shining bright my love; we all benefit from your glow.

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