I often get asked the question “How do you manage being a mother, running a business, have time for yourself and remain sane?”
Balance is an artwork that I am still in the process of refining. I left my job at 31 weeks pregnant to start my own business and although I was a woman on mission to up level my life, I was stressed, overwhelmed and anxious.
I knew something had to change.
Swapping from mummy hat, to business hat, to wife hat (and well any other hats you have hanging up on the hat stand of life) is tiring. Sometimes we forget to just sit down and give our brain some much needed time out.
I will be totally honest here, the whole concept of meditation was foreign to me too and the thought of participating kind of made me cringe. In my eyes, it was the type of thing that monks or hippies did and since I spent most of my life trying to be as ‘normal’ as possible, I avoided anything that made me feel socially uncomfortable and whenever anybody talked about meditation, I would feel…well…uncomfortable.
The only experience I had of meditating was at the end of a Yoga class and since I could never take it seriously, I would scarper out the class like a juvenile child just before the meditation section started. So what changed? Well I did.
Trying to be a loving, attentive and patient mother to two children under the age of 4 is a full time job Throw in running a business and suddenly life can become very overwhelming if you don’t take charge of your mind. Since I made a decision to be an extraordinary person and live an extraordinary life, I wanted to know what extraordinary people do on a daily basis. What made them successful? What separated them from those plodding through life? How do they remain focussed and productive?
Well of course, there are many things. However, the huge commonality are the daily disciplines and mindset that they have adopted and the practice of meditation. So, if all these people that I aspired to be like were meditating and they seemed like pretty ‘normal’ human beings, then I needed to jump on this bandwagon and see what all the fuss was about (I’d also given up trying to fit in so it felt like the right time to go really mad and attempt this meditation malarkey.)
So why is it so good? Imagine this. You decide not to clean your house for a month. Dust starts settling, clothes pile up, dishes fill the sink, limescale covers the bath, you sit on the sofa amidst piles of paperwork and the kids toys are strewn across the floor. Ok, now trying eating off a dusty table, cleaning plates in dirty water, bathing in a mucky bath and navigating through the house whilst tripping up over toys. It’s hard to focus and feel productive when your environment is a pig-sty.
Now let’s say the house is your brain. Over time, our brain starts to collect dust and clutter in the shape of negative thoughts, useless information or even great ideas that have decided to tuck under the plethora of ‘to do’ lists that you’ve mentally accumulated over time. When your brain has the opportunity to de-clutter, there is room for inspiration, creativity and a chance to recuperate.
Meditation is that time. How cool is that?
I’ll confess, I felt like a bit of an idiot during my first attempts at meditation, I sat there and I literally had no idea what to do or how to stop the many thoughts that were entering my mind. Am I doing this right? Shall I breathe deeper? What shall I have for dinner? Are the kids making a mess?
And two minutes in, I’d give up.
However. I was lucky enough to work with a top-level coach who introduced me to guided meditation. This was a game changer for me. I now allocate ten minutes in the morning and ten just before I go to bed and I’ll jump onto YouTube and find myself a meditation to follow and it takes the stress out of doing it alone. If I’m feeling extra fancy, I’ll put the kids to bed, fill up the bath, light a candle and listen in a tub full of hot water. Bliss.
I started to notice, I was getting more done, I felt a sense of calm, I was solving problems quicker and I was on fire when it came to new ideas to develop my business. Making the time to meditate for even a few moments in the day increased my productivity and creativity whilst decreasing my sense of “overwhelm.”
I’ve gone from total non-appreciator to self-confessed spirit junkie and I savour those quiet moments in the day when I get to just be with me. Remember, there’s no right or wrong way to meditate. As with everything in life, new habits take time to form so just try for one week to incorporate it in your day and I’m positive you will see the benefits and be joining me in embracing the new ‘normal’ in my club for meditating mummies. Now go find a quiet place, close your eyes and breathe….
Love and Light,