I want to share my Bali experience and journey with you. At first, I was feeling skeptical because of all the unrest that is happening around the world. However, our inside journey is very much a reflection of our world. And like many of the masters I studied with would say, to find peace in the world we will need to be at peace within first.
Tonight, I am flying tonight to Bali for one month. Twelve years ago, I planted the seed and have been dreaming of visiting Bali ever since. Three years ago, I was about to get on the plane to Bali and canceled my ticket an hour before. Now as I sit here - not even fully packed - I want to take few moments to write and share my intention with you.
I’ve been on a journey to find clarity for the past few years. I feel like there is so much confusion around us and I feel like there are so many unclear things inside of me. When I read Eat Pray Love in 2006, I was so inspired by how the author was open and raw and honest about her experiences with adversity and how her hardships eventually led to joy. At that time, I could not see myself being as open as she was to share my life with the world. But when adversity hits you, you’re stripped of everything and are just left with your raw Self. We are so afraid of pain and we have so much fear as humans, but the only way out is in. You have to go in to get out. You have to breathe through it in order to move through the layers of samskara (suffering).
When I decided not to go to Bali 3 years ago, it was the beginning of my journey to shed the layers that were not aligned with my heart. Unfortunately, my long term relationship of 23 years came to an end, and with a lot of grief and sorrow we went our separate ways. Many of our mutual friends were no longer my friends, and I left my synagogue - a place where I spent many Saturday mornings and holidays in.
What stayed true to me was knowing that I had to be honest with myself at each moment and to keep putting my boys first. I knew I would never forgive myself if I didn’t. I kept life simple with very few friends around me. Even though I thought this time would never pass, it did. Everything has an ending and a few good words from good friends when things were rough still stay with me to this day. The good that came out this situation was that I made a few new amazing friends and my relationship with my boys got stronger and healthier. My heart became more open and even in my acting life I felt more vulnerable.
This trip to Bali is a celebration of the commitment to the Self and staying true to our hearts. To stop betraying the Self and to be more compassionate to those that are in need. To celebrate my honesty as a teacher and my deep commitment to my students. And I would love to take you along during my month long journey in Bali. I will be teaching a few workshops during the Bali Vegan Festival while staying with childhood friends and family. And of course, I’ll be surfing, practicing yoga and getting some body work in. ☺
In the meantime, I am keeping you in my heart and I can’t wait to share my experiences with you as they happen. And I promise, I will be back with more energy to serve.