What if you were offered a chance to begin again, to create the life you wish for?
Fresh out of college, with no prospects of love or work on the horizon, Amanda moved back home. Living with her parents, in a suburb of Boston, was meant to be a temporary arrangement. Until she found a compelling reason to stay: Luke, the cute, young minister at her family’s church. Before she knew it, she’d fallen into love. And into divinity school.
By thirty, Amanda was married to Luke and had a promising career in a small-town New England church. From the outside, everything looked perfect. But inside? She’d lost herself. Marriage felt like a burden; her career, a mismatch. This wasn’t how she wanted to live. So she began shedding the “shoulds” and following her inner compass on an unexpected journey through divorce, out of the ministry, over the Italian Alps, and onto a small farm.
An inspirational story about waiting for clarity, trusting your inner wisdom, and the surprising turns life takes when you let and believe in possibility. The Do-Over is a refreshing reminder that you can always begin again.
I recently sat down with Amanda MacKenzie, to find out about her personal journey of listening to her inner being, making shifts toward a new and different life, and what lead her to write a book to inspire others to start over. Here is Amanda MacKenzie, on The Do Over.
Create a Life You Don’t Want to Escape - Amanda says she wrote the book because there seems to be many people who wish for a new or different life. At one time, she was that girl, explained MacKenzie. Her life was great by all appearances on the outside, but inside, she knew she wanted more. At the time, she was married, working as a minister at a small-town church, and she was comfortable in her life, but not truly content. It occurred to her that the only one stopping her from finding true happiness, was herself. And so, she set out on a journey of listening - not heeding to the expectations of others, but rather really listening to her inner self to create the life she wanted. Amanda says that even if just one person uses her book to find a path to a more fulfilling and authentic life, she will have succeeded in her mission.
Do Over’s Don’t Have to be Huge - Amanda’s do over resulted in massive shifts to her personal life and career, but she says do over’s do not have to be that big. She says that if you are not truly happy with parts of your life, you can make tiny shifts to find your inner happiness. She says The Do Over is about understanding the shifting ebb and flow of life. Tiny incremental shifts can change your path and happiness forever. She says that if you are no longer content eating the tomatoes you’ve grown in your garden all these years, it’s ok to dig them up and plant some watermelon. The same is true with life. If you are not truly content, plant a new seed.
Comfort with Uncertainty - Amanda says that when it comes to creating a do over in your life, it’s important to practice being comfortable with uncertainty. She says this can be very challenging, because basically one must learn to be comfortable being uncomfortable. When Amanda left her job as a minister at a local church, she says she felt a tinge of fear, like anyone would. She wasn’t sure how she would earn a living or pay her bills, but she learned techniques for calming the worry that occasionally pops up, in favor of being at peace in knowing that everything would work out fine. She learned to practice meditation. She also learned to embrace the upside of such uncertainty, which is freedom. For her, that freedom meant having an ability to try out new jobs and career opportunities she never considered in her old life. She worked at a cheese shop, a farm, and became a teacher of world religions at a local college. She adopted a personal philosophy that “clarity is waiting for the mud to settle.” In other words, you don’t have to have a clear picture of where you are headed, as long as you tend towards doing things you love every day in your life and work. By going about your day in peace, happiness, and harmony with your inner being, Amanda says the path will become clear over time. She says that life is only ever in this very moment. This moment is what we have and by being present in it, we release ourselves from worry about the past and future.
The Truth Will Set You Free - Amanda says that when you work toward living authentically, meaning that how you feel on the inside is how you live on the outside, you will begin to feel free. She says that by focusing on your own personal truth, you will stop caring about how your life looks compared to those around you. Your life does not need to look anything like that of your parents, your friends, or your peers. Amanda notes that many people follow in the footsteps of those around them. Their views on marriage, family, career, etc, are all ingrained in them at a young age, and many do not stop to reflect on what would really make them happy until they have already copied someone else’s life blueprint. For many, it’s once they’ve built a family, a home, a marriage, and a career, that they reflect and realize that parts of it are not what they really wanted. Amanda says that when you have an ongoing nagging feeling inside you that something isn’t right, then there’s part of you that needs to grow toward authenticity so that the outside matches the inside. As hard as change can be, she says there’s nothing more exhilarating than living your personal truth.