America v. North Korea: The real-life Clone Wars

Things have gotten so weird in America and around the world that we are actually now living in the Star Wars Prequels.

The main event in the prequels was the Clone Wars, which was fought between the Galactic Republic and the Confederacy of Independent Systems—also known as the Separatists. Chancellor Palpatine—secretly the Dark Lord of the Sith—manipulated both sides into a conflict that wore the Galaxy down to its core. Palpatine headed the Republic, while his apprentice Count Dooku headed the Separatists, and after three years of war, the Galaxy was shattered. Palpatine used the end of the war to combine the entire Galaxy—including the Separatists—into a new empire that he could rule for life.

Why did I use the prequels? Well, because we have a real-life Palpatine who is trying to take over the world by just sitting back and watching the rest of the world crumble. His name is Vladimir Putin.

Putin is a criminal mastermind, and it is no secret that his goal in life is to reestablish the Soviet Union. He was a KGB agent at the end of the Cold War, and he was devastated when the Soviet Union fell. Now, it seems he is trying to quietly take over the world and establish a new worldwide Soviet Union. Let’s call it the ‘Soviet World Empire,’ or the ‘SWE.’ His way to obtain it would be a real life Clone Wars, which would be World War III.

Let’s set the backdrop. Russia is one of the three major Superpowers in the world. The other two are the United States and China. In 2016, Putin installed a stooge in America named Donald Trump. Putin mastered cyber warfare, and he created conflicts with fake news in order to do it. He got Americans so divided against one another that almost half of them elected a mentally ill has-been reality TV host.

Then, there’s China, and Putin’s been working his magic there, too. China’s neighbor North Korea has been a focus for a long time, especially now with their madman Kim Jong-un. Kim has touted war with the United States for six years, and now he has Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles (ICBMs) that can hit the Lower 48. Where did Kim and North Korea get their ICBMs? From a plant in Ukraine. Recently, it was revealed that North Korea received oil from Russia, and the Washington Post recently posted an article detailing North Korea’s ICBMs, and how they resemble old Soviet missiles. If war breaks out on the Korean Peninsula, it would be World War III, because it would most likely take place near the Chinese Border, and China would view the United States as the belligerents.

Kim has increased his saber rattling threats since Trump became president last year, and whenever Kim has made his threats, Trump has responded with threats of his own. The latest was a pissing contest over who had a bigger nuclear button. It has become increasingly obvious that Trump is a mentally-unstable lunatic who very badly wants to be a dictator, and that Trump is in huge trouble and is possibly facing the end of his presidency with the Mueller investigation into Russian meddling and needs a way out. If Trump and United States declared war on North Korea, he could try to ask Congress for emergency powers, and there are plenty of compromised Republican Congressmen and possibly even Senators who might vote to give them to him.

There’s the backdrop. Everyone thinks World War III with North Korea would be the end of the world, because it could possibly be a nuclear war. It actually wouldn’t be the end of the world, and we would be perfectly safe here in the Lower 48. The war would be fought in the Far East and in the Western Pacific. Even if nuclear weapons were used, very few would actually be used, and any missile launched towards the United States would be shot down.

However, whether this war would be nuclear or not, the international fallout would be catastrophic. The United States and China would lose a significant amount of power and influence around the World, and Russia—who would stay “neutral” and play the role of “peacemakers”—would very slowly and quietly gain that power and influence. They would also gain the respect of the countries who would want the war to end. Putin could then try to convince those countries to join the new Soviet World Empire to ensure world peace. After that, the United Nations would possibly fall—which would be ideal for Republicans—and the only chance the United States would have to have any influence around the would would be to join the Soviet World Empire.

For years, conspiracy theorists have screamed about the ‘New World Order,’ which was recently renamed the ‘Deep State’ following Trump’s election. A lot of their conspiracy theories have been fed to them by Russian trolls, but now they are ironically the pawns for an actual potential New World Order.

There you have it; we’re living in the Star Wars Prequels now. Happy 2018, everybody!

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