Becoming a Warrior of Light in Challenging Times

The Lens of Non-Judgment

Regardless of the personal challenges that we face in our lives we must not forget or abandon our core values which allow us to view the world from a compassionate lens. This is easier said than done, and requires a level of awareness, that allows us to look beyond the limitations of behavior into someone’s soul. Sometimes we are so caught up in living the human experience that we forget to view the infinite possibilities that lie within the soul and spirit of an individual. We are not capable of doing this with everyone, for a variety of different reasons. But when we are able to treat our fellow man and woman from all walks of life with compassion we discover their innate beauty and magnificence.

After the death of my daughter Jeannine in 2003, I needed to examine my core values and beliefs and say goodbye to those that no longer served me, in my quest to learn how to live with catastrophic loss. I also had to determine, which existing values and beliefs could co-exist with my new ones.

Destiny Changed

“We are responsible for everything that happens in this world. We are the warriors of light. With the strength of our love and will, we can change our destiny….and the destiny of many others.” – Paulo Coelho

After Jeannine’s death, I began to see the value of treating others with compassion, understanding, respect and love, even during times when fear and despair dominated my thoughts. Once I began to consistently commit to developing a compassionate presence with others, the way I viewed humanity changed and the way that humanity responded to me changed. As a result, I became aligned with individuals with like values, other warriors of light. My perspective on life and particularly on Jeannine’s death changed due to my conscious choice to become a warrior of light.

It is not always possible to treat individuals we encounter from a benevolent and compassionate perspective. The human experience prevents us from liking everybody we meet, unconditionally. Individuals may present us with characteristics that awaken our deepest vulnerability or flaws, or who simply remind us of a person or persons with whom we have unresolved conflict. Experiencing those signs of negativity serve to awaken those parts of ourselves, that were perhaps previously hidden. Spiritual and self-awareness is not always synonymous with embracing the light, it is confronting and acknowledging our own darkness and limitations.

Embracing the Path

I wish to conclude this piece with some suggestions from my own experience that will help those who choose, embrace the path of the warrior of light, after catastrophic loss or other life altering circumstances.

•Strive to discover connectedness and common ground with others, rather than differences:

We all grieve differently; ours is not to judge or defend whose way is better. Comparing ourselves to others is a futile endeavor that just makes us and those around us miserable and disillusioned. Choose instead to seek to understand and to be an interested, non-judgmental witness to another’s path. Doing this will create an atmosphere where different points of view may be freely exchanged and perhaps assimilated by all parties involved. In this exchange, we engage in a symbiotic relationship, where we are comfortable becoming teachers and learners. As a result, we become more connected to ourselves and others.

•Embrace difference and diversity:

In our quest to find meaning in service after loss and commit to becoming a warrior of light, it is important to realize that our actions not only impact those whose lives we touch, but in turn, those whose lives they touch. If we are to impact humanity, we must understand humanity. To accomplish this, we need to become a part of all that comprises humanity. Make it a point to research and to interact with a group of individuals, that you know little or nothing about. Though they may be different in terms of skin color, cultural affiliation, or lifestyle orientation, in all likelihood these individuals have also experienced life altering loss or transitions. We can find similarity in difference and therefore widen our net of compassion and understanding.

•Recognize that we may have been warriors of light all along:

During the holidays and on other milestone dates (i.e. birthdays, angelversaries) surviving family members honor their loved ones in a variety of ways. Individuals may give a gift, monetary or otherwise, to a worthy organization in the name of their loved ones. Others may randomly pay for another person’s meal, coffee or toll booth fare. Some may volunteer their time to a needy organization or one that was meaningful to the deceased. During early grief, we may simply view these actions as essential in honoring our loved ones’ memories, and in the process giving us some moments of peace. However, these actions, perhaps unbeknownst to us, also make us warriors of light.