Constance Hall has been on both sides of mom judging.
The Australian blogger shared a simple but impactful story with a selfie she posted on Facebook on Wednesday.
In the caption, Hall described a mother she saw at school pick-up every day. The woman had a nice car, spoke in a “posh” accent, looked very put-together and seemed very confident.
“There I was, with my tits out breast feeding my babies, smelling like dried milk, matted hair, a puffy face from a morning in tears, no shoes and a partial bogan accent ... It was like she was put on this earth to amplify my insecurities,” Hall wrote.
“So I did what a lot of women do and I tried to instigate a ‘chat’ about her to another mum, partly out of intrigue and partly hoping to make my feral self feel better,” she added.
But the other mom did not engage with her “chat” and instead gave Hall some meaningful advice: “Talk to the woman not about her.”
With that in mind, Hall decided to talk to her one day and was surprised at what she learned.
“I found out she is an ex addict and holds AA meetings to help out other addicted women that want sobriety, I found out she struggles with her marriage, her kids and her health just like the rest of us. I found out that she is a million things, snobby not being one of them. She is one of the most inspiring women I know,” wrote Hall, adding that they are now very close friends.
“Turns out I have a confident exterior too, turns out that while sitting there hating my life without the confidence to talk to these gorgeous mums, they didn’t have the confidence to talk to me, they thought I was too free too relaxed, that I thought I was too cool,” she wrote.
Hall explained that her kids are at a new school now and have heard gossip about her from fellow moms. With that in mind, she offered the same advice she heard that day long ago: “Talk to the woman not about her.”
The Facebook post received more than 93,000 likes, and the comments section is filled with enthusiastic responses from mothers sharing their own school drop-off and pick-up experiences.
“We need so much more of this! Our next bestie could be a simple ‘Good morning’ away,” wrote one commenter. “I wish people would talk to me not about me too,” added another.
All too often, the advice parents give their children can apply to their own lives as well: Be kind to one another, and you can help make the world a better place.