Ben Carson Did What?!

Um, was I the only one who watched Ben Carson's latest appearance on Meet the Press?

If you don't feel like risking nodding off to his Cecil-the-Turtle-monotone delivery above, here is a transcript via Meet The Press:

CHUCK TODD: Do you think that people mistake your soft-spokenness with a lack of energy?

DR. BEN CARSON: I think so. I have plenty of energy. But, you know, I am soft-spoken. I do have a tendency to be relaxed. I wasn't always like that. There was a time when I was, you know, very volatile. But, you know, I changed.

CHUCK TODD: When was that?

DR. BEN CARSON: As a teenager. I would go after people with rocks, and bricks, and baseball bats, and hammers. And, of course, many people know the story when I was 14 and I tried to stab someone. And, you know, fortunately, you know, my life has been changed. And I'm a very different person now.

Yeah, sure, I can see--wait, what?!

Rocks, bricks, baseball bats, AND hammers?!  The amusing anecdote of when he tried to stab someone?! How is no one talking about this? This is not just puffing on a joint and "not inhaling," it's assault and attempted murder. Do you remember that nutty kid from your neighborhood who tried attacking someone with a rock, brick, baseball bat, hammer or knife? What if he tried them all for good measure? Would you want him sitting in the oval office across from the red button even if he had finally gotten his shit together and found Jesus?

Fortunately, you know, his life has been changed and he's a very different person now. Fantastic! Let's put that "changed" person in one of the highest positions of stress and power with access to the world's largest stockpile of thermonuclear weapons and gamble on whether his newfound faith in the Savior keeps him from Hulking out when he feels a tad too persecuted. That's a great fucking idea!