Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So each week, we round up the most hilarious 140-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more!
Cool, you can curl 50 lbs but I can carry a baby on my hip, a purse & a dozen grocery bags on each arm to avoid making 2 trips to the car.
— Misstlovestrinkets (@mstluvstrinkets) August 23, 2014
It's the time of year when kids start school, parents get sick of filling out paper work, and teachers judge our parenting skills at lunch.
— Mommalicious (@SouthrnPinUpMom) August 26, 2014
1st day of school: Hell yeah, kids are gone!
3rd day: F-you math homework.
— YKIHAYHT (@YKIHAYHT) August 25, 2014
My son Atticus has started saying "my eyes are turning black" when he's tired. Because he closes his eyes and sees blackness. KIDS R CREEPY
— Amanda Nelson (@ImAmandaNelson) August 27, 2014
Keep clicking: See last week's funniest parenting tweets >>