We grieve. The continual loss of lives of unarmed black men and the loss of police officers trying to protect our communities have caused collective emotional pain. Accounts of tragedies in Dallas, Baton Rouge, and Minnesota join those of Ferguson, New York, Cleveland, Milwaukee and other cities, are becoming reoccurring news headlines, almost so that we can no longer keep track of what happened where.
We hope. We know that city-wide protests across our nation, vigils and prayer services where community and civic leaders call for more dialogue to increase understanding between the two sides and President Obama urging us to remain hopeful are necessary but insufficient measures for bringing us together.
We believe. We breathe a temporary sigh of relief witnessing people line up to give police officers hugs. We scan the lines for the embrace between white officers and African Americans. We pray that the killer of the Dallas police officer was indeed a lone gunman and that white Americans will not claim his actions as representative of the entire black community and that the message of the #Black Lives Matter Movement will not be lost. We pray that the violence against police officers will not continue.
We fear. The tension weighs on us all, for in our hearts we fear that the lack of trust between the police and the black community might be irreversible. We know that building that trust is a huge effort that requires eliminating the root causes ― creating quality education, establishing a fair and just criminal justice system, having greater access to good jobs, affordable housing, gun control, and achieving health equity. We know that these conditions will not be created by the implementation of best practices for community policing.
We wonder. How do we move forward with sustainable change on an issue so deeply rooted in our national history of race relations and embedded in our psyche as Us vs.Them?
We make choices. We can choose to “agree to disagree” which will only leave us polarized. We can work to co-exist peacefully in our separate realities, acknowledging and tolerating each other. Or we can work toward a WE, which is a much harder route to take because it requires a life-time commitment and a great deal of humility.
Join in adding to the five choices each one of us can make to turn us and them into we:
- Think about differences as a challenge rather than a threat. We go into fight or flight mode when we perceive differences as threats. When we treat differences as a challenge we are posed for learning and growth.
- Get information from a variety of sources and digest it carefully and thoughtfully.
- Experiment with having a respectful, honest and candid exchange with another person who doesn’t think like you. Listen for understanding and not rebuttal.
- Use social media to inspire, ask questions, and engage others in smart conversations.
- Connect with other WE creators. This work can only be done in community.