COMEDY

Blackface On Halloween: A Definitive List Of Do's And Don'ts

It's all don'ts.

It's the day before the much-hyped Halloween bash and you're PANICKING.

As you try on the Mother Teresa costume that hilariously contradicts your lack of moral values, something becomes glaringly evident: the crotch is missing. Either your dog chewed a hole in the fabric or you accidentally bought one of those XXX Mother Teresa costumes.

At the eleventh hour, you decide to go as Nicki Minaj or Kanye West, or any other number of black celebrities and characters. But ... if you're white and they're black, then what do you do? 

Now, before you go applying to the MacArthur Foundation for a $625,000 Genius Grant, know that you aren't the first person to consider the application of cosmetics to resemble a black person. This is called "blackface." And you are called "a dumbsh*t."

Don't worry, Dumbsh*t! I am here to provide a complete list of "do's and don'ts" to help make your decision an informed one.

 

The "dos"

 

The "don'ts"

  • Don't
  • Don't
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  • Don't

Hopefully this breakdown helps you reach the conclusion that's right for you. If you're still on the fence, read more on this subject matter by following this link to the Merriam-Webster definition of "don't."  Keep being yourself and someday they'll add "dumbsh*t" to the dictionary, too.

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