Boundaries help to protect our soul and our world. They enable us to remain strong and centered in ourself. When we are establishing our life as teenagers we want everyone to accept us, we want to find a common ground, community to be included, and as we grow, many of us don't grow out of this conditioning. We become adults and still find ourselves in the identity of the group.
There is nothing wrong with being involved in groups but we must understand that we shouldn't have to seek acceptance or our identity from the group. We know exactly who we are with or without the group. It can be easy to want to fit in and be accepted but we must remember that we don't want to fit in at the expense of ourselves and our identity and boundaries.
What we must remember is, what gives us life, gives us respect and allows ourselves to be true to who we are. A comprise of any of the three is room enough to set up boundaries.
Boundaries begin with oneself. It means setting up boundaries to say "you've eaten enough," or "it's time for a walk." Boundaries often seem restricting at the time but they usually give us back so much.
After we can effectively set boundaries with ourself we may then want to move onto setting boundaries with others. Boundaries mean that we must enforce them, it is not up to our partner, friends or family to enforce them, it's up to us. Boundaries with others enable us to create our lives based on what we value, respect and our inner truth. Stepping out from the need to always be wanted and included we can see that we can create our lives and still be involved with others, in a way that doesn't honor everyone but simply honors ourselves. When we honor ourselves we give others permission to honor and love themselves to.
Sometimes the deepest respect that we can give to ourselves and to another is the respect of boundaries.
What boundaries can you create with yourself?
What boundaries can you create with your partner?
What boundaries can you create with your friends?
What boundaries can you create with yourself?
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