According to Direct Selling Association, millions of Americans are involved in direct sales, adding $36 billion to the economy in 2015 alone. And in 2016, there were more than 20 million Americans who participated in direct sales (no, it is not your imagination that everyone seems to be selling something!). Multi-level-marketing (MLM’s) aren’t a new business model, they have just done some rebranding over the years. You may remember Avon and Mary Kay from the past (who can forget the pink cars?), but now may more readily recognize nutrition and weight loss companies such as Beachbody, Isagenix, Herbalife, and Plexus; clothing and jewelry companies such as LulaRoe, Chloe & Isabel, and Jamberry; Essential oil companies like DoTerra and Young Living; Skincare and beauty companies such as Rodan + Fields and Nu Skin; and home and cooking companies like Pampered Chef and Norwex.
Just scroll through our Facebook feeds and there will be no shortage of passive (or sometimes too direct!) postings, images, and #GirlBoss’s trying to sell products. There has definitely been a shift in the past five years in the number of individuals selling online, and especially since we have had the option of accessing all our ‘friends’ (I definitely use that term loosely) through the interweb. The curious element to ALL of these companies is the way MLM’s masquerading as women’s empowerment. You feel like you can have it all, be it all, do it all. You can work from home, you can provide for your family, you can be there for your kids, you can own your own business, you can be in charge of your time, and YOU can be in control of your future. Gosh…I even want it on those promises! And, we need to know that there might be nothing farther from the truth. This type of messaging actually sounds eerily familiar to the Superwoman Ideal.
The Superwomen Ideal was a construct born out of the women’s movement in the 1960’s defined as women who can ‘do it all and have it all.’ However, women today may actually be receiving the message that they SHOULD have it all and are experiencing distress as a result of internalizing this pressure. As we experience more thoughts related to ‘we should be more successful’, ‘we should be spending more time with our kids’, ‘we should be working less’, ‘we should be thinner,’ we should be eating better’, our dissonance increases. We are glued to our phones and we are constantly checking our Facebook feed and messages to see what is going on or who we need to reach out to, none of which feels relaxing and joyful. As our dissonance of where we are and where we think we ‘should’ be grows, we experience anxiety, negative mood, irritability, and less than stellar self-care (since we might be scrambling each day trying to get our ‘should’ list done with little time left for anything else). The ‘should’s’ in our life take over and CONSUME us. We begin to think we are failing at being an entrepreneur, as being a wife, as being a friend, as being a person who can take care of ourselves, and most importantly, as being a mom. The Superwoman Ideal creates an anxious tension that we are so close to being where we want to be, and yet very far away.
Various studies have suggested that girls and women who endorse the Superwomen Ideal were likely to experience disordered eating behaviors. The women who internalize this idea of trying to have it all may also experience maladapative perfectionism. That is, a personality trait that drives us to unattainable goals that can sometimes be driven by social roots. Although we know disordered eating patterns are multi-dimensional in nature, stemming from a variety of factors such as the media, culture, personality, family, environment, and current life circumstances, we ABSOLUTELY need to be cognizant of what factors we are immersed in right now that are playing into this dynamic in our own lives. For example, many women who are in MLM organizations buy into the idea that their lives are going to change significantly by their endorsement and marketing of various products because this is what is promised to them by their new ‘tribe’ (maybe not overtly, but covertly through sparkly selfie photography and pinterest-worthy home/office/business style shots). As this lifestyle imagery begins, there is an increased dissatisfaction and dissonance when they are not where they are ‘supposed’ to be. This can be a very dangerous cycle to jump into, especially for those that are not even aware of this happening or their role in perpetuating these messages. And, it creates an enhanced risk for developing harmful attitudes, self-care, and health behaviors that can have a trickle down effect on family, work, and home life boundaries.
For those that are in MLM companies and have had an amazing experience, that truly is great!!! There are definitely times when this business model is a great fit and we can feel fortunate that there are opportunities beyond what we had imagined even 5 years ago that would allow us to provide for our family and do meaningful work. I have some personal friends that keep this balance and feel good about their participation in MLM, and many have said that being in their MLM has opened their eyes to entrepreneurial life and gave them courage to pursue bigger things. That is definitely special and something not to be ignored. And, we also need to keep in mind that what we see being marketed to us is not always the truth. According to a report from the Federal Trade Commission, 99% of people who join MLM companies lose money. Who decides if this model is brilliant or predatory to those that might be vulnerable to its messages, or both? Is it really a way to promote women’s empowerment, or does it contribute to a contradiction within our culture about what it means for a women to have it all? What would it look like if we embraced a ‘wise women’ versus ‘super woman’ approach to how we see ourselves exceeding in business and life? You decide.