Choose Happiness

For years I have been dependent on other people or things to make me happy. I have waited in the wings for flowers, words of affirmation, the next shopping spree. I wanted the fairytale, but I expected someone else to create it for me.

My fairytale came to an end when my husband of 22 years decided he didn't want to be married anymore. He walked out leaving me scrambling for the pieces of my shattered life. I had no idea how to be happy on my own.

So I am now creating my own fairytale. I'm figuring out how to make my own happiness.
And there are days that it is so very difficult.

Are you waiting for your happiness? Are you expecting someone else to create your happily ever after? Don't. Do not give another person that much power, whether thy know they have it or not.

You see we really can't control anything. We can however use what we have and where we are and do the best that we can.

So don't wait for someone to send you flowers then be disappointed when it doesn't happen. Don't expect someone to tell you what a great job you are doing then get all bent out of shape when those words don't materialize. Create your own positivity. Do what YOU need to do instead of thinking someone else is going to do it for you.

I have a jar that sits by my bed labeled "Happily Ever After." Each night I take a slip of paper, date it, and write down something that makes me happy. As I look back through those slips I am amazed at the simple things that I had been missing for so many years while I waited for someone else to create my happiness. I traded my contentment for frustration and missed out on so many small blessings that make such a huge impact in my life. I have made myself slow down to actually enjoy that cup of coffee or the sunset, instead of hurrying through anticipating the next thing. I am enjoying my family and friends, with no expectations other than good conversation and lots of laughter. I no longer am disappointed when someone doesn't do something I think they should do. I'm realizing it is not my job to place those expectations on someone else simply because that's not my responsibility.

My life has no room for toxicity. I've removed all toxic people, toxic ideas and toxic talk from my personal world. It's counterproductive to my happiness and contentment to have any negativity in my life. I surround myself with good friends, fun activities, great family, an exciting job. I make sure that everything I come into contact with is positive. I used to think that this was impossible to do, but it's not. Difficult sometimes, but not impossible.

And when I look at the happy person I am now compared to the unhappy person I used to be, I am so thankful that I made the choice to do it.