If any couple serves as the living embodiment of “Get Off My You-Know-What,” it’s probably Ciara and Russell Wilson.
Much like a herpes outbreak, you can count on one or both going viral every few months or so for, quite literally, just living their best lives. As soon as they get out of bed in the morning, they start squatting in folks’ heads without so much as paying a light bill. It’s always an absurd spectacle.
This week, Ciara is in the news for attending a Vanity Fair Academy Awards after-party on Sunday — arm-in-arm with Wilson — wearing a barely-there, crystal-covered dress by designer Dundas. The getup, and the accompanying thong, leave little to the imagination.
I’d like to dig into why folks seem to have such an aversion to her outfit in the Year of our Lord 2023. For some reason, I thought we were past this, but it seems that slut-shaming is eternal.
Ciara is a pop star. She was a pop star before she was married; she was a pop star before she had children. Attacking her success relative to her peers is of no consequence — she’s an active artist still putting out new music, so being outside in her draws at any given point is essentially a professional expectation. No, you can’t show up to your mortgage company Christmas party wearing that. Let it go.
Other celebs also showed up more-or-less-naked to the Vanity Fair after-party, but crickets for them. Also, Ciara’s male pop star counterparts show up nipples-out to awards shows as a matter of routine … I wonder why we don’t get on them? Wait, no, I don’t.
The other complaint I’m seeing is that Ciara is a mother, and how dare mothers go out dressed all sexy-like?!? Look, I’ve dated enough mothers in my day to understand that most desire an evening or two not cooped up in the crib wearing their college sweatshirt coated in infant vomit discolorations to doll up, step out and get in touch with the sensuality that got them knocked up to begin with. No notion is steeped in patriarchy quite like the belief that a mother or a wife needs to mute her allure because she’s married or has children.
“No, you can’t show up to your mortgage company Christmas party wearing that. Let it go.”
Folks also unfavorably compared Ciara’s getup to more “tasteful” Oscar gowns, including Angela Bassett’s dope purple Moschino dress. I was originally going to write about Bassett and Ciara’s generational differences, or how Bassett stunted on all you fools in a bikini on her 60th birthday — but I realized none of that matters! If Bassett wanted to show her assets on Sunday — while 64, married and someone’s mama – that would’ve been her prerogative! And she’d remain one of Black entertainment’s crown jewels.
While I have your attention, I must touch on Wilson and the amount of completely misguided hatred he seems to have received for … being an avowed cornball? Being a great dad? And to someone else’s child at that…?
Almost a year ago, former NFL player Channing Crowder went viral when he called Wilson “a fucking square” on his podcast. Crowder said, “If Russell didn’t have that bread, Ciara wouldn’t be with him,” which is the highest-frequency hater dog whistle anyone can blow. Of course Ciara is with Russell Wilson because he’s a good-looking dude with a cut frame and a nearly $300 million NFL contract. Are we expecting her to be with the dude who can only do the minimum monthly payment on his Discover card?
And Russell seems to be a refreshing change of pace from Ciara’s famous exes, including 50 Cent, Trey Songz and Future, with whom she had a son and broke off an engagement due to his infidelity. Crowder had the gall to ask, “You’re going to leave Future for Russell Wilson?” as if Nayvadius isn’t the patron saint of “don’t-marry-this-type-of-dude.” He has his own meme cementing this.
Of course, Future went full Future, reinforcing why Ciara should’ve left him by suggesting Wilson wasn’t “being a man” in his partnership with her. One of the least manly things someone can do is prove to the world that they’re still butthurt by insulting the person your ex justifiably left you over. That he made that statement in his tax bracket blows me.
A lot of people are rooting for Wilson to prove that he’s no good — the way that we all always knew Derrick Jaxn wasn’t. But until I see pictures of him with some other woman face-down, ass-up, I will assume Wilson is the stand-up guy he’s shown us. Even then, I’d wait for Ciara to confirm they weren’t acting in ethical non-monogamy.
The most aggravating, and probably the most hypocritical, haters of the devout Christian couple are so-called Christians, engaging in supercilious foolery to suggest that these rich celebrities and performers should operate under the same set of rules as the King Above. Because what better person than a perfect, fallible stranger to cast aspersions on a couple with whom they’ll never be in the same room?
As annoying as it is for me to watch, I’d like to believe Ciara and Wilson are completely unbothered by it all. Because nothing blocks cast stones like a tightly knit web of cash.