5 Things You Should Never Say To A Kid Going Off To College

The weeks before a freshman goes off to college are nerve-wrecking, exciting, and disproportionally spent at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. It is time for young adults everywhere to fly the nest and begin their own lives independent of their parents. As I step over the cusp into adulthood, here are five things I hope my mother doesn't tell me when I leave for college.

Don't forget to brush your teeth.
Mom, I know you are afraid that I will forget everything you've taught me, lessons both large and small, but I've been listening to you even when you thought I wasn't. It's time to trust that I will remember how to brush my teeth just like I will remember to be kind, to think before I speak, and to write thank-you notes in a timely manner. Thanks to you, these habits have been ingrained in me since birth and I wouldn't be the same without them.

Don't gain the Freshman 15.
You have been there to nourish me since birth. You won't be there anymore to make a batch of chile rellenos for me after a long day of school. My meals will no longer be prepared with that special seasoning you bought from our trip to Belize. Dining hall chicken fingers can't hold a candle to your arroz con pollo. Nothing can compare to a home-cooked meal. Trust me, I will lay off on the 1 a.m. pizza so I can have a second helping of your mashed potatoes at Thanksgiving.

Don't forget to call every day.
College is a time to show you how independent I can be and I need you to acknowledge that your baby girl is all grown up, but you will be surprised at how well I can handle myself. You are not done being my mom, and I am not done being your daughter. By giving me that little bit of freedom and independence, you are giving me a chance to show you what a great mom you are and what a fantastic job you've done raising me.

College is where you get your MRS. degree.
Mom, I know you are only saying this because I will be far from home and you don't want me to feel lonely. I promise, there will be tons of people to look out for me. I will have friends, RAs, advisers, and, yes, maybe even a special someone to help me through thick and thin. I know it's scary having me 3,000 miles away, and even though I will get homesick, I will never actually be alone.

Can't wait for you to start law school.
To that I say "in due time, in due time." I know that you are excited that I will soon be picking my major, working towards a career, and considering post-graduate studies, but right now I'm just excited to be starting my first year of undergrad school. How about instead we take this time to celebrate the fact that I made it to college, take a tour to admire the beauty of the campus, browse through the course catalog and discuss the pros and cons of taking a class on the sociopolitical impact of Nirvana (the band, not the state of bliss). Let's enjoy this time together in the present instead of fretting about the future.

Celebrity Empty Nesters