As the coronavirus outbreak nears pandemic level, families in the United States are dealing with school closures, empty grocery store shelves and a general sense of fear.
So, as they do in other times of stress, chaos and uncertainty, many parents have turned to Twitter as an outlet for their anxiety. We’ve rounded up 35 tweets with light observations, jokes and other musings about parenting in the age of COVID-19.
Keep scrolling if you need a reprieve from the grim news cycle and a reminder that you’re not alone.
“Bye! Wash your hands! Love you! Wash your hands!” - Me every morning basically— 🗽 Liz Gumbinner (@Mom101) March 4, 2020
Me: Did you wash your hands?— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 9, 2020
Me: Why are your hands wet?
4: I licked them.
That should kill the germs.
While I am worrying about not touching my face, I am watching my kid and every other kid touch just about every surface on this Earth without a care in the world.— Josh Jordan (@NumbersMuncher) February 29, 2020
Me: So there are a lot of scary viruses going around and we need to wash our hands a lot, ok?— Marl (@Marlebean) March 5, 2020
My kids: Meh
Me: Thousands of people are dying and all you need to do is wash your hands
My kids: You said everyone dies someday
I’m no fan of the coronavirus but the mere mention of it did finally convince my son to stop using his hands to eat ravioli so let’s not rush to judgment— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) March 2, 2020
It might seem like I’m stockpiling groceries over coronavirus fears, but the groceries in my shopping cart are probably only going to last my 11 year old through this Tuesday.— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) March 7, 2020
5-year-old: I know if you’re old or weak, you can die from the coronavirus. So, if grandad was still alive, he could die from coronavirus...but he already died.— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) March 6, 2020
He’s brilliant at finding silver linings.
My 6mo loves to try and put his 3yo brother's entire nose into his mouth, and neither of them want their runny noses wiped, so coronavirus prevention is going really well at my house.— Some Boys' Mother (@someboysmother) March 6, 2020
9-year-old said she heard cornavirus was “made up by adults to trick kids into washing their hands.”— Nick Turner (@NewsyNick) March 9, 2020
I asked who told her this and she said, “A kid at school.”
Now I just pray this kid doesn’t know how to post a Twitter thread.
"Parenting in the Age of Coronavirus"— Amy Shearn (@amyshearn) February 26, 2020
A one-act play by me and my kid
Kid: "At recess, we played this fun game called Infection"
Me: "THAT SOUNDS VERY DANGEROUS YOU SHOULD NOT PLAY THAT"
Kid: "Mama, calm down, it's basically tag"
Me: *dies of anxiety anyway*
Everyone’s worried about having enough food and supplies at home during a potential Coronavirus quarantine and all I’m thinking about is— what the hell am I going to do with my kids all day everyday indefinitely????— Ilana Wiles (@mommyshorts) March 6, 2020
Me: The important thing is that we get real good about washing hands and make sure NEVER EVER to touch our faces.— carly kimmel (@carlykimmel) February 29, 2020
Kids: *nodding in agreement while both IMMEDIATELY start rubbing their eyes.*
Me: Oh fuck it, we're all going to die.
Talk to your kids about the coronavirus.— dara mathis (@TrulyTafakari) March 9, 2020
My 8 yo daughter came home and matter-of-factly told us that the “coronavirus comes from Canada,” per her reputable 2nd grade source 🥴
Aminah just told Miles he needs to bathe. “Do you want the corona virus?!”— Belly Rowland (@ElitatheLibra) March 7, 2020
Someone asked me if I was concerned about getting the coronavirus.— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) March 1, 2020
“I was exposed to the germs my kids brought home from Chuck E. Cheese birthday parties. You can’t scare me.”
A coworker just told me that if I go traveling I better get a coronavirus mask now before they run out— Richard Dean (@dad_on_my_feet) March 4, 2020
Or at least I think that’s what he said.
Cause as a dad of young kids, I started involuntary PTSD-convulsions after he said “travel”.
Me: Wash your hands.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 6, 2020
4-year-old: I don't have germs.
Me: Yes, you do.
4: I'm not a boy.
At my kid’s school they made their recess game of tag into “coronavirus” and “it” is now called a “carrier.” 😆— Mothman but no prophecy (@orthecreedence) March 9, 2020
The 5yo just told me her friends were eating sand today and “actually” she ate some too, “just a clump.” So coronavirus education going great here.— Farah Miller (@farahlearned) March 10, 2020
*whispers* if my kids have to stay home from school because of coronavirus does my deadline get extended— Sabaa Tahir (@sabaatahir) March 10, 2020
Costco stopped serving samples because of the coronavirus, so now I have to actually feed my kids this weekend.— No Idea: Daddy Blog (@byclintedwards) March 7, 2020
Are you texting, snapping, and meme-ing your kids to wash their hands?— Kara Kinney Cartwright (@dbaKaraKC) February 29, 2020
Things might seem bad and scary, but we’ve already gotten through the worst of this, that first month when all the cool dads were making corona beer/coronavirus jokes.— Jennifer 기윤 (@jendenbrat) March 4, 2020
My daughters are making plans for when I catch coronavirus (“you’re bound to get it, some kid is always hugging you, coughing in your face or licking your arm”)— Karen Cole (@karlou) March 4, 2020
As long as I have hot drinks and a pile of books to hand, two weeks in the shed doesn’t sound too awful really...
Waiting to board at JFK, kids letting off a little steam— Kevin Graham (@webblyhead) March 2, 2020
Playing a variation of tig they play at school. Seems fine to me.
The name of the game....Coronavirus🙈
The look on the faces of the people around them every time one of them wins👀 pic.twitter.com/J5cQzaihZF
Son: “Daddy, did you know 3 people in our state have the coronavirus?”— The Walking Dad (@RealDMK) March 6, 2020
Son “WE HAVE TO ELIMINATE THEM”
Ummmm do you mean quarantine?
Son: “No they must be killed so it doesn’t spread”
I’m thinking there’s some panic & misinformation going on in the middle schools
Just walked out of the gas station and I told my kid to back into the door with her booty instead of opening it with her hands and this lady starts singing “Won’t you back that ass up?” and opens the door for us with her butt. I’ve literally never had more respect for someone.— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) March 9, 2020
I’m worried about coronavirus but my baby’s head is in the 96th percentile and his body is in a regular percentile so when he sits up his head bobbles around like Harry Caray.— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) February 28, 2020
10 had to write a paper on stopping the Corona Virus. His solution? We should go back to traveling on horse back bc, “the fresh air will do us good and it’ll take longer to get where you are going so that gives more time for doctors to figure this out.”— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) February 27, 2020
Make him President now.
The coronavirus began and spread originally from a Chuck E Cheese.— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) March 10, 2020