You know the song 'Crazy on you' by Heart? I often wondered what exactly they meant by that phrase. What does it really mean to be crazy on someone?
In all of my conversations with friends about their dating lives, one thing has become abundantly clear; men make us crazy. Women who are bright, independent people, unperturbed by work place challenges and who relish the intrigue of most of life's curveballs, are reduced to crazy women when a man with whom they are enamored comes into the picture.
The point at which the craziness sets in varies from case to case. Sometimes it's after one date or three. Other times, it's before we've even met. They give an inch and it makes us feel like we can take a mile. An established pattern of a daily text leaves us reduced to sniveling messes when we don't hear from them the next day. A single kind word leaves us yearning for more, fueling our lust and intrigue with each empty compliment.
All craziness is not created equal. The manner in which craziness manifests itself changes, ebbing and flowing in intensity. There are days when it's a slow simmer and days where we literally think of nothing else but the impending blink of a text message. I think it's safe to say we're all obsessed with our phones. But if we normally check for texts or emails a few times an hour, when we're waiting to hear from that special guy, it increases exponentially as we manically check our phones 10, 20, 30 times an hour.
But the texting is just the beginning. We also take to overanalyzing every single word of every single conversation, both in person and by phone. When they said they were 'just hanging out' that night, does it mean they're with another woman? When after a seemingly great date, they say they had an amazing time and we'll talk soon, does it actually mean we will?
I've heard stories of women who force themselves to take 'phone breaks'--hours away from their phones--just so they can resist the temptation to reach out and contact their guy, or who check obsessively to see if they've heard from him. Others who will set a mental timer laying out the exact frequency with which they can check their phone. Or how about when we permit ourselves to send a solitary text only to be racked by regret immediately thereafter that we didn't play a little harder to get and make them work a little bit more--and then obsessively await their response anyway.
To be fair, some of this craziness is a result of history proving that women should be constantly on the defensive. Guys often don't say what they mean. Mostly, they say what they think we want to hear with zero intention of actually following through with their promises. And while on the one hand, there's something tremendously intriguing about having a crush, and the heady mix of emotions that swoops in with every contact they make, I for one wish I could take the crush and leave the crazy. In the mean time, thanks Heart for putting into words just how these guys make us feel.