The Blog

3 Dating Blunders Single Women Make And What To Do Right Now To Turn Them Around!

Let's face it. As much as you may want a good guy in your life, finding him as a single woman dating in her 50s, 60s and 70s poses its own set of challenges; challenges that can seem daunting at times.
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

Let's face it. As much as you may want a good guy in your life, finding him as a single woman dating in her 50s, 60s and 70s poses its own set of challenges; challenges that can seem daunting at times.

If you're like most women this age, you probably didn't date much when you were younger. In fact, the majority of relationships happened as a result of hanging out with the opposite sex in class, at lunch or at youth events you were both involved with.

It's safe to say that you didn't expect to be divorced, single and dating at this time in your life, did you? Since divorce judges don't hand you a dating rulebook as you leave the courtroom, you're left to fend for yourself, figuring dating out on your own.

You find yourself frustrated and sometimes wanting to just give up on your dreams of finding a good guy to share your life with.

Instead of going after what you want, you talk yourself into being satisfied living a life filled by kids and grandchildren.

It doesn't have to be this way. Dating can be fun and you can get a good guy, especially when you have a plan in place for meeting him.

Part of the plan is about understanding the blunders you could be making in dating that are keeping you feeling challenged and so alone.

Blunder #1. Believing when the time is right, a good guy will just show up in your life.

Wouldn't it be perfect if finding a good guy really happened this way? Well, it can but first you must put yourself in situations where he can find you.

What this means is you'll need to work the dating system so you can find him and he can find you. Make sure you're on dating sites that are the right fit for you and while you're at it, turn your friends into dating fairy godmothers who can fix you up.

If you like the idea of finding men "organically," you'll want to be in social situations where men over 50 congregate and you'll need to know how to approach them when you're interested.

In The Fun Path to Mr. Right, you can learn the secrets for meeting the good guys you want, how to get them to notice you and exactly what to say once they do.

Blunder #2. Believing you'll just know he's the RIGHT GUY when he shows up.

Teenage girls love hanging out with boys. Remember how much fun that was?

You didn't feel the pressure to find "the one" on your first interaction together. You spent time together at school or at work and you laughed and played as you experienced the things you loved in life.

You put in the time getting to know each other, often spending years together before deciding ... Yes, I'd like to spend the rest of my life with this man.

Fast forward a few years...

Today, you go on a coffee date and before the coffee is finished, you've figured out whether or not he's right for you. You don't play and you don't just hang with guys as friends like you did when you were younger.

Knowing he's "the one" on a first date rarely happens.

In fact, when you make such a fast decision, you often miss a lot of guys who would have made great friends to hang out with, or possible boyfriends if you'd given them the chance ... like you did when you were younger.

Next time you meet a nice guy, spend time playing and having fun, seeing how you might fit in each other's lives. Being around male energy -- even when he's just a friend -- is a lot better than sitting at home alone every Saturday night.

Blunder #3. Giving up too quickly.

I've had women tell me that when five dates in a row didn't work out, they wanted to quit dating. This is about the time they came to me frustrated and looking for help.

What I shared with them is the same thing I'll share with you now. They had created a picture of who a man was based on the words he wrote and the picture he posted online.

Having expectations before you meet sets you up for failure, especially when a guys turns out to be totally different than the way he portrayed himself online.

When this happens, you can end up feeling depressed and hopeless about ever finding your guy.

So here's what you can do instead. Go on future dates with the mind set of, "I'm going to meet someone new and interesting today."

This will make dating far more fun for you. Plus, it will keep you from making snap judgments about who you think a man is.

Persistence is the name of the game when it comes to dating. Take breaks when you need to, but get back out there when you can because your guy is out there waiting for you to find him.

Lisa Copeland is the Dating Coach who makes finding a great guy after 50 fun and easy. Get Lisa's free report, 5 Little Known Secrets To Finding Quality men by visiting

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

At A Certain Point In A Relationship, Sex No Longer Matters

Most Common Sex Myths About Boomers

Popular in the Community