By Kate Anthony for YourTango.com
So many men are often put off by dating a single mom, and I have to say it's a little mystifying to me. There are some seriously outdated misconceptions out there that give single moms a bad rap, like the belief that single mothers are just looking for a dad for their kids (please, my kid's dad rocks and I'm not in search for a replacement!). When it comes down to it, I really think single moms are the dating world's best kept secret. Here's why:
1. Low Drama
Look, we've had a baby (or two or three), we've been through a divorce... we're pretty focused on raising our children and supporting our families. We're all grown up. We don't have time or the inclination to sweat the smaller stuff. We're mature and real, and lord knows we don't have time to throw our own temper tantrums when we've got kids doing it for us. We want you to be our refuge, our safe harbor and our grown-up playmate.
2. Great Sex
Speaking of playmates — our hormones have done a lot of things and the likelihood is that we're in our 40s or close to it, which means, gentlemen, that we're in our sexual prime. I don't know of one single mom who isn't looking to have her mind blown sexually. Most of us came out of sexually dissatisfying marriages and are ready to play, to explore, and to totally revel in our newfound freedom and glory. Don't you wanna be the guy at the receiving end of that?
3. No Biological Clock Ticking At You
I hear this from guys all the time: "If I date a woman in her 30s, she wants to know where it's going and when we're getting married and having babies within, like, 3 months! But if I date a woman in her 20s we have nothing in common." Well, guys, here we are! You're looking at an amazing array of women whose biological clocks have ticked and tocked and likely don't want or need more babies. Have at us! Yes, we have children, but guess what? You're not gonna meet them unless this gets serious. So, if you fall in love with us, you're gonna have to be willing to take on all that that means, but in the meantime, we just wanna have fun.
4. We Are Powerhouses
I personally believe that single moms are some of the most powerful women on earth. We have stood strong while everything around us crumbled, whether we made that call or not. We have picked ourselves up by our bootstraps and made something of and for our children and ourselves. Oh — and we gave birth. Let's not forget that little tidbit. If you're looking for a woman you can respect and honor, you'll find her in the single mothers pool.
5. No Whining, No Games
Look, we may call you out when we feel you're not satisfying us or living up to our expectations, and yeah, we're human and we're women, so you won't always understand us, but we will never be whiners and over-complainers. We have children who do that to us all day. At the end of the day, we want a glass of wine and a grown-up conversation. We're not about to play games, either. We want clear communication and we'll give it back to you in spades. The likelihood is that we'll set the stage for it, and you'll be so thrown for a loop you won't know what to do at first. But pretty soon, you'll breathe a huge sigh of relief and relax into the whole idea.
So, men, if you just can’t seem to find that sweet-spot of women to date that are awesome, smart, fun, sexually adventurous, won't pressure you or play games, give some single moms a try. We want partnership and love just as much as the next girl, but we won't use games and drama to get it, and we'll take a longer time before we start wanting "more." And we won't bite... unless you ask us to.