Of course the mere mention of the 4th of July, the Day of Independence in this country, conjures memories for many of summer days at the beach, sun-kissed noses, barbeques, carnival rides and fireworks...and perhaps a nod or two to our country's founding fathers and the Declaration of Independence. 240 years of freedom to be exact. But what does it really mean to be free, to feel truly independent?
It got me thinking of this notion of freedom -- and where it lands for me.
Freedom is an inside job; it's real power comes from within. Part of the problem is that we are conditioned to look to the outside for the answers -- Who can save me, Who can I blame this on? Think about it for a moment. When we are engaged in stressful situations or relationships, we often see ourselves as justified in responding to these circumstances. When we feel stuck or backed into a corner without choice, we feel we are obliged to RSVP. Note to self: We are free to change our minds at anytime, free to not engage. It takes two to tango -- so if we don't agree to step out on the dance floor, there is no dance.
This has been a tricky one for me throughout my life. If I could travel back in time, recollecting the moments in which I gave my energy (i.e. power) to things that weren't serving me -- suffice it to say, I might live another lifetime. Ha! Oh well, the past is the past... and, as I like to say, it's looking at your ass. So onward.
There are many events that will present themselves that trigger our deepest fears, insecurities and bare our Achilles heels. Many of those things will present themselves as warranting a response. They will beckon to us, try to engage us and even convince us that our participation is required. Have you ever taken a ride on that emotional rollercoaster? On some level we all have. They don't call them life lessons without reason. And that class will remain in session until the mission is accomplished, lesson learned.
I recently had a vision of "unplugging" from a situation that has long evoked quite a charge for me. I literally thought of pulling a plug from an electrical socket. We wouldn't try to turn on an unplugged light, right? The same goes with us.
In the past, the mere thought or mention of that particular circumstance could set me off -- however, I kept doing my work. I kept trying to heal from the inside out. I redirected my focus from the charged situation, back to me -- to feeling at peace, and to holding onto that sensation. I'm not going to diminish the process or sugarcoat the events. In fact, I worked hard and my healing unfolded over many years. One day I realized that it had lost its grip upon me. The charge was gone, as if it had vanished into thin air. Suddenly, it felt like a deep, rejuvenating exhale, the kind you awaken to after a nap on the beach. Aaaaah.
When we're in the thick of drama, we don't see clearly. We forget to take pause. We forget that we don't have to react to everything with an immediate response. We forget that we have the freedom to choose.
My personal independence emanates from a place of self-love and self-care. When I listen to myself -- to my gut and intuition -- I save myself a tremendous amount of angst, struggle and resistance. When we allow ourselves this freedom, we are honoring our highest selves, and creating room for possibility in our lives.
Is there something you need to declare yourself free of? Perhaps in the form of limited thinking, a difficult relationship, self-defeating theories, a job you feel shackled to, a dream you've sidestepped, a slew of excuses that have prevented you from doing, living and being who you were meant to be?
If you could close your eyes and wish your wishes come true... what would they be?
Don't wait for the new year or your birthday to make resolutions -- start today, state your declarations and go forth... besides, I'm sure you've got some summer festivities to get to, so why not bring your best self to the party... the 4th of July celebration and your life. Happy Independence Day!
But before you go -- let's state some declarations together.
I declare myself free of the following:
•Judgment -- of myself and others
•Excuses -- any preventable situation (i.e. credit card debt, lack of time) that positions itself as a veritable reason for keeping me from attaining a deeper goal
•Limited thinking -- the voice that whispers to me, I'm not enough
•Self-defeating theories -- anything I picked up from others along the way that prevents me from allowing my soul to sing
•Control -- allowing my action steps and intention to be infused with faith and belief that anything is possible
Let's celebrate our freedom, inside and out.
What would you put on your list?
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