Demi Lovato reportedly said recently that her addictions helped her cope with suicidal ideations while she “genuinely was in so much pain.”
In an interview for an upcoming episode of actor Diane Guerrero’s podcast, “Yeah No, I’m Not OK,” the singer revealed that using drugs and alcohol “stopped me from dying,” reports E! News.
“In the same way it almost killed me, it saved my life at times, because there were times that I dealt with suicidal ideations. And had I gone forward with that in that moment, instead of another destructive coping mechanism, I wouldn’t be here to tell my story,” Lovato said. “I turned to those coping mechanisms because I genuinely was in so much pain that I didn’t want to die and I didn’t know what else to do.”
Lovato has long struggled with addiction, mental illness and disordered eating, and has openly talked about her ongoing battles.
She celebrated six years of sobriety in March 2018, but then relapsed and overdosed on narcotics in July of that same year. The singer was revived with Narcan and later had three strokes and a heart attack.
“I did the best that I could at times,” Lovato told Guerrero, “and now that I have other tools and other resources, I know how else to deal and how else to cope so I don’t have to resort to those behaviors again.”
She went on to say that part of her pain came from comparing herself to her peers in the media.
“I would just compare myself, not feel good enough, not feel thin enough, and wonder how it was that these people were living lives that seemed so perfect but yet I was in so much pain,” she said. “And when I got into the spotlight, I was like, ‘Oh, it’s not perfect here, nobody has a perfect life, it just looks that way.’”
YouTube is releasing a documentary series later this month called “Demi Lovato: Dancing With The Devil,” which is about her 2018 overdose and return to health.
Need help with substance use disorder or mental health issues? In the U.S., call 800-662-HELP (4357) for the SAMHSA National Helpline.
If you or someone you know needs help, call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. You can also text HOME to 741-741 for free, 24-hour support from the Crisis Text Line. Outside of the U.S., please visit the International Association for Suicide Prevention for a database of resources.