Dear Mr. and Mrs. Trump,
I write, with regret, to inform you that your son Donald has not met the standards for admission to our middle school. His record and his interview indicate that Donald is not sufficiently mature to enter the 5th grade.
As you know from our mission statement and admission brochure, one of our core values is honesty. The trust and respect our students and teachers share is built on a firm foundation of integrity. Unfortunately, many of Donald's statements during his school visit reveal a fragile relationship with the truth. For example, Donald made up a fantastic story about people celebrating during a very tragic event. While fantastic memories are not unusual among younger children (I once believed I was a pirate, for instance), we expect this imaginative phase to end by the middle school years. When Donald's fantastic story was clearly disproven he stubbornly insisted that it was true -- a troubling sign of incipient sociopathy.
We are also worried about Donald's social behavior. Others among our school's core values are empathy and respect for differences. Our admissions office received an alarming video clip that showed Donald mocking another child who suffered from a minor physical disability. Donald probably suffers from deep, pathological insecurity, which often explains this kind of aggressive, demeaning behavior. We also received a report that he had several children forcibly removed from his birthday party because they interrupted him while he was singing to himself. This is a matter you may wish to discuss with a therapist.
Our school also nurtures modesty and humility. We found Donald's interview surprisingly immature for a boy his age. When asked about his academic strengths, Donald response was, "I can tell you this... I'm going to do great." This happened repeatedly. We asked Donald how he gets along with other kids. He said, "They love me. They all love me. I can tell you this... the kids here are going to love me." Donald spontaneously shouted, "I'm rich. I'm really rich," several times. While we are not diagnosticians, you might want to mention Tourette's syndrome to your pediatrician.
When we toured the school he saw a construction crew doing some renovations. For some reason he started yelling, "Nobody builds walls better than me, believe me." He then muttered something about how Mexicans will pay for it. He appears to have a strange phobia about Mexicans. We had a Mexican theme for lunch the day of his visit and he refused to eat, saying, "They're bringing drugs, they're bringing crime, they're rapists, and some, I assume, make good tacos. That I can tell you."
Our middle school curriculum includes a significant section on gender identity and building healthy relationships between girls and boys. We are particularly concerned with adolescent girls' concerns about body image and the negative impact of female objectification. When Donald visited a gym class, the teacher overheard him referring to Molly Stein as a "fat pig" and that she might look better on her knees. We note that Donald may be overly sensitive because of his own weight. This is not unusual in early adolescence and we believe Donald will achieve a more optimal BMI as he matures. He commented several times about how the "good lookers" were staring at him. This overcompensating behavior is sometimes observed in boys who are struggling with their own sexual identity.
Donald's record indicates that he is a fairly bright boy, but he doesn't seem to apply himself. While he could recall some basic mathematical concepts, his knowledge of details seemed sparse. Quite often he would say, "I know math. Believe me I know math... that I can tell you."
Perhaps our greatest concern is Donald's overall behavior during his visit. He called the admissions assistant a "moron" and said that the receptionists were flirting with him. He said we should accept him so that he could make our school great again. He implied that all the other schools are beating us because their leaders are sharper than ours.
Saying that to the head of school is not a good interview tactic... that we can tell you.
Sincerely,
Steve Nelson
Head of School