Oh, thank God! Never mind that device that keeps people from reclining their seat on a flight and starts a fight and gets you diverted to some other destination.
I just saw on Amazon the invention that is going to save the airline industry:
This blessed miracle product promises to banish the miseries and embarrassments of long plane rides belted in beside strangers, or for that matter, a first date to go see Les Miz, after she talked you into trying the bean salad.
Unfortunately, "Flatulence Deodorizing Pad" just is not a catchy name, and if there is one product you definitely want to catch on, it is this one.
So as a public service, here's...
Doug's Dozen: 12 Better Names for the Flatulence Deodorizing Pad
1. The Cheese Cutter
2. The Ass-Fix-Iator
4. Toot Sweet
5. Rosy Cheeks
6. Poison Control Center
7. Cease & Desist, Odor!
8. Chesterfield Filters
9. Sit 'n' Breathe
10. Blast Assist
and what I think is the odds-on favorite...
12. I Can't Believe It's Butt-Air
Read's Doug's comic novel, Memoirs of a Time Traveler,
...or in paperback..