You can talk about plot twists and dumb storylines and internal strife. But I can tell you the main problem with Grey's Anatomy Season Four ($59.99; ABC Studios) -- that problem is Private Practice First Season ($39.99; ABC Studios). (That comes out on Tuesday, September 16.) It never fails. Someone launches a successful series, a show that brings them acclaim and big ratings and will literally make them rich for life. So do they focus on that show and try to make it as good as it can possibly be? Sometimes. But usually, they get suckered into spin-offs and launching other shows or movies and instead of one good show, you get two weak ones. Maintaining the quality of a primetime series is a backbreaking job. But doing it for two shows? That's pretty much impossible. I really don't understand why anyone would even try. You become richer than God if you create a hit primetime show like Grey's Anatomy. And when it's reached the end and you want to make something new, people will line up to do business with you. So why spoil your baby with a bunch of new projects? It's almost worse than what David Milch did when he dumped Deadwood to make the horrible John From Cincinnatti. I mean, at least he just stopped Deadwood rather than let it become a mess. Battlestar: Galactica was easily one of the best shows on TV, getting better year after year -- until season three. Guess what was occupying their minds? A spin-off set in the past called Caprica that will in fact begin after this show is over. CSI: Miami Sixth Season ($79.99; Paramount) is one of the most popular shows in the world. But is there anyone who thinks that the unique blockbuster success of the original CSI hasn't been diluted by two indistinguishable spin-offs? I mean, how many blood splatters and hair fibres can you analyze, anyway? If The Wire had a fifth and final season that wasn't quite the equal of the brilliant fourth, you might look at the energy its creators put into launching Generation Kill. TV is littered with countless other examples of people dropping the ball on a great show because they got distracted by the lure of spin-offs and other projects that could give them a media empire. And far rarer is the example of a show like Cheers: a massive hit whose creative team stayed with it to the end and then -- and only then -- launched a spin-off. Is it any suprise that Frasier is arguably the greatest spin-off in TV history?
So tell me, any recent TV shows break your heart by falling apart in quality?
Also out this week:
Cult Classic -- The reputation of The Big Lebowski ($19.98; Focus) and the iconic status of the Dude continue to grow. Has it really only been ten years since this Coen Brothers comedy came out? It seems like it's been around forever. For $34.98; hardcore fans can get a copy of the DVD housed in a plastic bowling ball.
Best Reason To Buy A Plasma TV -- How The West Was Won ($20.98; Warner Bros.) is out in a three disc set fully exploiting its eyeball expanding Cinerama. The movie's a bit stolid, with John Ford's entry clearly the leader in quality, but it's definitely a spectacle. And the bonus docuemntary on Cinerama is almost as much fun on its own. Seriously, I really need to get a plasma TV.
Comedy's Secret Weapon -- If you read the comedy issue of Rolling Stone currently on newsstands, you'll notice one name popping up a few times: Peter Cook. He truly was a seminal figure on British comedy on par with Monty Python. Check out Peter Cook and Dudley Moore: The Best Of...What's Left Of...Not Only...But Also... ($24.98; BBC Video), which offers up highlights from their seminal early sketch series and you'll begin to appreciate his genius.
Once Upon A Time -- Shelley Duvall's Faerie Tale Theatre ($99.98; Koch) was the best -- okay, the only -- reason to buy Showtime in its early years. Duvall charmed all her friends into appearing for peanuts and the result was that oft-described phenomenon: a labor of love. How else to explain a top actor like Robin Williams playing the Frog Prince or such quirky casting as Klaus Kinski (as the Beast) and Paul Reubens as Pinocchio. This boxed set contains all 26 episodes and more extras than the 2005 set, including the retropsective cast party and Duvall's pitch reel. For fans of Jim Henson's The Storyteller and anyone who delights in charming, witty family entertainment.
Britcoms -- Every Saturday night all across America, PBS stations air a block of British sitcoms and dub them Britcoms. My mom never misses it, even if they are all reruns and she's seen them a dozen times over. The lineup changes from town to town and runs from the sophisticated lunacy of Fawlty Towers to the banality of Are You Being Served? But there's one constant: class. I don't mean "classy." I mean "class" as in social status. Is there anywhere in the world more obsessed with class and social distinctions than England? India has its caste system too, I guess; they're just not as funny about it. Two amusing Britcoms embody that. Keeping Up Appearances: The Full Bouquet ($129.98; BBC Video) has fun with Hyacinth Bucket (pronounced "Bouquet"), who desperately wants to maintain her non-existent high standing in the community but is cursed with low-class relatives. You'll find virtually no variation to the formula: Hyacinth wants things to be just so and her relatives or friends or someone puncture her dreams but she behaves as if she's the Queen of England anyway. It's not great, but it's certainly consistent. Of a higher class in every way is To The Manor Born ($79.98; BBC Video), the witty 1979 series in which Audrey fforbes-Hamilton (the great Penelope Keith) must sell her stately home to a...tradesman (a wholesale foods magnate, actually) and move into the estate's tiny cottage. Not that this keeps her from interfering and disapproving at every turn. Sparkling dialogue abounds. And how do they maintain that class? Three seasons, 20 episodes and then they call it a day. (This set also contains a Christmas special and a 25th anniversary reunion show, radio shows and more. Even more class.)
Horror -- Child's Play 20th Birthday Edition ($14.98; MGM) is a suitably playful special edition of the B movie romp that includes audio commentary from actors, writers, producers...and even Chucky himself. Fox Horror Classics Vol 2 ($19.98; Fox) and though it only contains 3 more movies, this set sure ranges far: Chandu The Magician, a serial remake with Bela Lugosi as the villain (he would later play the hero); Vincent Price in the gothic tale Dragonwyck and the offbeat drama Dr. Renault's Secret. All fairly obscure and hard to find so consider that a comment on Fox's weak bench when it comes to classic horror or a happy example of half-forgotten movies getting a new life thanks to being randomly packaged together. But if you really want a horror film, try Foreign Exchange ($24.98; Screen Media) a would-be high school romp with sex hungry males feasting on the super-hot foreign exchange student.
TV on DVD -- Ugly Betty Second Season ($59.99; ABC Studios) also lost its way during the show's second season. They let the telenovela take over with wacky storylines and ignored the heart and soul of the show -- Betty (America Ferrera). More Betty, less bombast! Medium Season 4 ($59.98; Paramount) gets a lot of mileage out of Patricia Arquette's Allison Dubois being outed as a psychic and how that upends her life. Just as long as they don't find out she's a hockey mom. It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia Season 3 ($39.98; Fox) has 15 snark-filled episodes with Danny DeVito having a blast in episodes purposefully revolving around tasteless topics like who's been sleeping with a pre-op transexual...again. Jon & Kate Plus Eight Seasons 1 & 2 ($19.95; Genius) is a reality series about a couple that had twins and then sextuplets and if that doesn't scare you off artificial insemination, then nothing will. Wings Seventh Season ($39.98; Paramount) draws to a close this modest, but well-cast comedy with Tim Daly and Steven Weber. Yes, the Cheers folk launched it, but that original show had been around for seven years and they still stayed day to day on the important one.
Kids Stuff -- Alvin and the Chipmunks Go The Movies ($16.99; Paramount) is lazy kid's programming -- just episodes riffing off movies like Batman and Indiana Jones and even lazier packaging. This is the latest rehash of some of these episodes and since we're talking about shows that aired almost 20 years ago, why not include ALL the parodies in one set rather than mixing and matching them again and again? The Best Of Barney ($19.98; Lionsgate) collects just 60 minutes of highlights from the properly maligned children's show. They describe it as "super-dee-duper" and that about says it all. Legion of Super Heroes Vol. 3 ($14.98; Warner Bros.) collects just five episodes from the series, which means you'll have to buy five volumes to get all the shows from the first two seasons rather than two volumes with each 13 episode season complete. I'm noticing a pattern here. On a happier note, The Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries First Season ($19.98; Warner Bros.) do indeed contain all 13 episodes from the show's first season. Unfortunately, it ran in 1995, long past the heyday for these characters. Thomas and Friends: The Great Discovery ($19.98; Lionsgate) is at least a new feature length film with Pierce Brosnan providing voice-work as the narrator. Back to the bad news: The Spectacular Spider-Man: Attack Of The Lizard ($19.94; Sony) tries to con people into buying the first three episodes of the new cartoon series. Just wait for the full-season DVD set or you'll feel as much of a chump as Peter Parker. Finally, Tortoise Vs. Hare ($19.98; Genius) is a so-so animated film that can't live up to the high Jim Henson standards even though it's released under that banner. If it seems like a bad week for kid's stuff, don't forget that Shelley Duvall's Faerie Tale Theatre is out.
Blu-Ray -- Jackie Chan and the not-so-retired Jet Li co-star in The Forbidden Kingdom ($39.99; Lionsgate) is just the sort of action title fans want on Blu-Ray, even if it does cost $5 more than the Special Edition DVD and $10 more than the standard DVD. Cool Hand Luke ($28.99; Warner Bros.) is not one of those naturals, but what a terrific movie. Paul Newman has rascally charm to spare and maybe knowing a whole bunch of new people are appreciating his work will lift the ailing actor's mood. The Fall ($38.96; Sony) proves director Tarsem is the most original visual stylist to hit Hollywood since Terry Gilliam. Smallville Seventh Season ($79.98; Warner Bros.) marks the arrival of Supergirl, which of course means that the show has long ago run its course and they know it: the eighth season will probably be its last.
This and that -- Jason Statham has probably his biggest success yet (when you look at reviews and box office) with the B movie heist flick The Bank Job ($29.95; Lionsgate). It's the sort of flick you Netflix or catch on cable and say, "Hey, that wasn't bad!" Reprise ($29.99; Miramax) is more of a genuine find, with two buddies struggling to remain friends (both novelists) as one becomes famous and the other just continues to struggle. Sarah Palin...I mean Tina Fey stars in the mediocre comedy Baby Mama ($29.98; Universal) -- but what does she care when she's still got 30 Rock? Heckler ($19.99; Echo Bridge) is a comedy documentary that couldn't be funny if it tried. Get off the stage! You suck! My dead grandmother is funnier than you! Actually, it's a pretty amusing look at comedians and how they deal with hecklers, featuring everyone from Jamie Kennedy to Bill Maher, Lewis Black and Kathy Griffin. We Are Together ($19.98; Palm) is a documentary about the kids in an orphanage who find consolation and joy by performing in their Agape Choir. Look for the heart-tugging feature film any minute now. Less sweet is VH1's Last Days Of Left Eye ($19.97; Anchor Bay), which features footage from the last days of TLC singer Lisa Lopez. And dying won't stop her: she's got a new CD out soon. Finally, there's The Life and Times of Mr. Perfect ($29.95; WWE), which contains a 90 minute documentary on the pro wrestler and 10 complete matches.
So tell me, any recent TV shows break your heart by falling apart in quality?