Ellen DeGeneres Is The Presidential Candidate We All Want, And Need



Ellen DeGeneres for president? 

During the opening monologue of her talk show Wednesday, things get political, quick. 

"I don’t know if you realize this but there’s a crazy presidential race going on. Have you heard?" she asks the crowd. "On one side, we have a strong, experienced, powerful woman and on the other side we have -- wow, my mind is … I’ve gone blank I can’t remember who is on the other side." 

We suspect a certain business mogul-turned-presidential-candidate will have a toddler-like retort for her.  

The comedian goes on to address an online poll in which she was voted the No. 1 celebrity who should run for POTUS. DeGeneres beat out everyone from Samuel L. Jackson and Bill Murray to Donald Trump himself (way down at 26). She even outranked Oprah, but assures everyone, "she doesn’t want it anyway. She’d have to move into a smaller house." 

And while she was flattered by the results, DeGeneres says she won't be heading to the Oval Office anytime soon. 

"Thank you and not interested. Thank you," she says. "That sounds like the worst job in the world to me."

After pointing out a few more names on the list, DeGeneres explains that she has "no political ambition," but there are a few things she'd do "to make like better for people." 

For instance, she'd close the gender pay gap, put gas tanks on the same side of every car "so you never have to guess," and best of all, she'd get rid of the political parties and throw a giant pizza party instead.

Where do we cast our vote? 



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