"Just five more pounds. I just need to drop 5 more pounds and then I'll be happy."
That's what I used to tell myself over, and over, and over again.
It was never enough.
I always felt like I needed to drop five more pounds. Just five more pounds and then I can be happy and love my body.
My body performed, felt, slept and had more energy weighing 10 pounds heavier, but my brain, my desired weight- the weight I thought I needed to be at to solve all of my problems- was 10 pounds less than what my body wanted to naturally stay at.
I refused to embrace my "sweet spot."
And the media definitely supports this refusal.
In magazines we read, "How to drop those stubborn 10 pounds"
Book titles promise us to, "Lose the last 5 pounds in 5 days"
Our girlfriends tell us, "I just need to lose 5 more pounds and then I'll be happy"
We tell ourselves, "I bet I look so much better if I dropped 10 more pounds"
Let me tell you something...those 5-10 pounds you're so desperate to get rid of?
That is your LIFE.
That's the popcorn and candy you had at the movies with your girlfriends.
That's the ice cream you ate to cool off when you and your friends went swimming on that super hot summer day.
That's the cocktails and dinner you had at your best friend's wedding.
Those 5-10 pounds hold all the joy, fun, and memories you've made.
Let's be real here....
Food can make experiences so much grander, and actually allowing yourself to enjoy these food filled experiences makes it that much better.
So many of us KILL ourselves in order to lose those last 5-10 pounds. We'll skip outings with friends, and family events, in order to avoid eating anything we've labeled as "bad". Then once we've arrived at that desired weight, in order to maintain it we'll put ourselves through hours of exercise, itsy bitsy food portions, order the same salmon and broccoli, and DON'T YOU DARE ASK FOR THE DESSERT MENU!!!
When you could embrace your sweet spot and forget the insanity.
Sure your sweet spot may be 5-10 pounds more than your desired weight, but with those 5-10 pounds comes a more joyful, satisfying, and fun life.
We all have a point in our weight where it's easier to maintain. At this weight we don't require restrictions or crazy long workouts. It's that set weight that our body naturally likes to be at and can easily maintain it regardless of a few splurges here and there. Like no matter how overboard you go, it sorts of recalibration and you always end up back at that weight.
I've been at my sweet spot for a while now. It's easy. I'm also 10 pounds heavier than what I used to desire for my frame and height. I'm much happier, healthier and at peace with my body. I've long since let go of that desired weight that came with no real benefits other than a stupid smaller number on my scale.
In my sweet spot, I do 30-45 minute workouts once a day, 5 days a week. I can have my weekly family pizza nights, 2-3 glasses of wine a week, and enjoy treats that I've made on an as desired basis. I don't have to calorie or macro count. I don't have to drink a gallon of water a day to make sure I'm flushing everything out because God forbid I should carry any extra water weight, AND I don't have to eat these tiny, bland, and unsatisfying meals every 2 hours.
At my desired weight, the weight I WISH I were at, in order to maintain that weight I have to work out 90 minutes a day, 6 days a week. Bye bye pizza, bye bye wine, sniff sniff cheesecake. At my desired weight I have to take time to calculate how many calories and macros the skinless chicken breast and salad I'm about to eat contains. At my desired weight I have to track my water intake to make sure I get in a gallon of water a day and then go live in the bathroom thanks to my tiny, child-bearing bladder. At my desired weight I turn down friends and family invites to do fun things because you know, I'm tired from my long a*s workouts and only eating 1,200 calories a day, and I can't even eat any of the food they'll be serving because then I'll beat myself up for it and feel all guilty and have to burn it off!
Yes. I rather be 10 pounds heavier and love my life. I rather be 10 pounds heavier and get to enjoy my weekly pizza, wine nights and dessert if I desire. I rather accept invitations to events, and not feel weak and exhausted every day.
The funny thing is, when you stop scrutinizing everything that goes into your mouth, and you stop seeing food as calories and macros and instead see food as you know, FOOD, your body image starts to shift.
Slowly and surely you embrace your body more. Slowly and surely you stop talking down to yourself. You stop scrutinizing everything you don't like. Slowly and surely you start loving what is, right now, not later.
And no, of course I'm not against goals and striving for new levels, I'm all ABOUT that shizz. It's what got me into the best shape of my life in the first place! What I'm talking about is the, "I'll be happy when..." syndrome.
"I'll be happy when I lose 5/10 more pounds. I'll be happy when I'm a dress size smaller. When I can see my abs, or lose my cellulite."
The problem with that is that your happiness is depended on a number instead of an internal source of self-love. And truth be told, when you do lose those few extra pounds, are you really happier? Or you do you just start a new, "I'll be happy when..."?
Embracing your sweet spot is about being happy NOW.
You don't need a number on the scale to be happy. You don't have to wait until your scale that is ill informed to begin with, tells you you've reached your desired weight so now you can be happy.
Be happy RIGHT NOW, NOT LATER!
Can you embrace your sweet spot and let go of, "I'll be happy when..." syndrome?