The world always says "everything happens for a reason." To many, they live their life fully believing that there is reason in the way life works. I guess I just can't see it that way... my brain and heart know that instead "everything happens for a purpose."
I believe we must live our life with a purpose and the knowledge that our experiences, lessons, losses, gains, pain, blessings and tragedies are in our life and our journey for a purpose. If we can see those things as a purpose to change, adapt or help someone as opposed to a rational explanation or a product (reason) -- I know that we would be different beings.
In February of 2012, my 5 ½ year old daughter Madeline passed away. She was diagnosed with DIPG (Diffuse Intrinsic Pontine Glioma), a rare and inoperable brainstem tumor. She passed away only five days after her diagnosis. I am often annoyed and confused when people tell me that Madeline died for a reason. I guess my brain cannot wrap itself around a reason that my daughter would die. I know inside of me that she didn't die for a reason -- she died for a purpose. There are no logical explanations that her passing is the product of, but instead there have been so many amazing and fulfilling experiences that prove her purpose. I believe that God speaks in this purpose, in these moments. He sent in the troops to move mountains for our family. He carried me on my heaviest days. He guided us to Madeline's legacy and her purpose.
Her life didn't just happen, and her death doesn't hold reason and sense. She was a piece of something bigger, as we all are. Our lessons and our bliss are all part of this journey, this something bigger. What good is reason and clarity if we all wander around not seeing the big stuff, the grand purpose?
I don't correct people impolitely and get all angry at their response... after all, it is 'the thing to say' to someone in this crazy hard life after loss. I do say. in my own words, that Madeline had purpose; all of our losses have purpose. I know that Madeline changed so many hearts. She brought many people back to faith and living. She has helped me connect to so many people who were supposed to be in this journey for our family. She has helped build a foundation, Maddie's Mark Foundation, that helps other families faced with crazy hard lives and sick kids. She has shown so many that life is freakin' good; it is hard... it hurts, but it is good.
Her purpose lives in so many lives and hearts. I believe that all children and people have a purpose, even after death. I know families whose children have inspired organ donations, help with depression, childhood cancer awareness and new laws to keep other children safer. I believe we all have a purpose, not just a reason.
So the next time you are thinking, "Everything happens for a reason," think a little harder and dig a little deeper... ponder the purpose instead.