Life coach Iyanla Vanzant believes that parents are the foundation upon which children build their lives. So when she met Jay Williams, the biological father of 34 children from 17 different women, Iyanla knew that sitting down with his mother would be key to understanding his story.
Jay is a successful video producer in Atlanta who has worked with some of the music industry's top talents. While he has excelled professionally, his personal life is a different story. In the above clip from a three-part episode of "Iyanla: Fix My Life," Iyanla sits down with Jay and his mother, Stacey. "I am a firm believer in the statement made by Ralph Waldo Emerson that a man is who his mother makes him to be," Iyanla says.
Stacey can now look back and take some responsibility for the outcome of her son's life. "The fact that you have had all these children is because I didn't love you enough," she says to Jay. "I did not provide that stability for you. I did not provide that home for you."
Iyanla points out the problem. "Because there is a distinction between having a child and raising a child," she says.
Stacey admits she was too enveloped in her own pain to raise her son. "By the time I married your father, I was broken already," she says. "And by the time we got to the other side of that marriage, I was shattered completely."
"So I had nothing I could give you," she tells Jay, causing him to break down in tears.
Iyanla encourages Jay to allow himself to break down so that he can begin to finally heal. "Let your heart break for the 5-year-old Jay who didn't know how to feel or what to say," she tells him. "Because until you are totally broken open and whole, you can't be there for your children, Jay."
"Fix My Father with 34 Children, Part 2" on "Iyanla: Fix My Life" airs Saturday at 9 p.m. ET on OWN.
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