Imposter Syndrome - we’ve all heard of it. It’s when you feel like a fraud, regardless of how accomplished you are. Most people experience imposter syndrome in professional environments or in academia.
It’s that feeling that you don’t quite fit in, and you aren’t meant to be here. Somehow you got lucky, but sooner or later, they’re going to pull back the curtain and see through your false veneer of accomplishments.
One woman in my current CWYL program is a lawyer who took the past few years off to raise her three children, and is now looking to go back to work. Even though she’s been incredibly successful as an attorney, and her old law firm has already hired her back on a part time basis, she feels like a fraud as a lawyer. She always has.
When I worked on Wall Street in private equity doing these billion dollar leveraged buyouts, there was always a part of me that felt like a fraud, like I didn’t belong. And when business school classmates from Stanford would get together and “talk shop,” I was never that interested in discussing the deals I was working on, or what kind of multiple of EBITDA we’d gotten on our latest exit.
Recently, it’s hit me that maybe we have it wrong about imposter syndrome.
What if, sometimes, imposter syndrome is a sign that you’re not doing the work you’re meant to be doing in the world?
Yes - there's a type of imposter syndrome that has to do with doubting our abilities and not feeling confident. And, what if there is another reason for imposter syndrome that has more to do with whether we're doing the right work.
What if you feel like a fraud because there is a part of you that is doing this job because you “should” do it, or because it’s what everyone says is the most practical or successful thing to do, not because you deeply want to be doing it.
What if you ARE acting like a fraud - to yourself.
Maybe the issue isn’t that you have a hard time owning your accomplishments, but that these particular accomplishments don’t actually mean that much to you. They don’t light you up.
The woman in my group coaching program who feels like a fraud has also realized she doesn’t want to be a lawyer anymore. She doesn’t enjoy being a lawyer. She never has. In fact, when her old law firm asked her to come back part time, she said her whole body felt heavy. She accepted the job temporarily due to financial reasons, and now that she’s back at work, she doesn’t really want to be there.
What if she feels like a fraud as a lawyer because she’s fooling herself?
As this woman shared that she felt like an imposter as a lawyer, I thought back to how I used to sometimes get that feeling when I worked in finance. No matter how successful I was, there was a part of me that felt fake, especially when I would talk about my work to other people.
The truth is, I wasn’t that passionate about my work. So it was fake.
For the first time since quitting my job in finance seven years ago to start my own business, I thought about my current work as a women’s leadership expert and realized something truly amazing - I have NEVER felt imposter syndrome doing this work I love.
Sure, occasionally I feel a bit unprepared or wish I had more experience. But I’ve never once felt like a fraud. I’ve never felt fake the way I did when I worked in finance.
In fact, for the first time in my life, I feel like I truly belong when it comes to my work. When I walk onto a stage to give a keynote, I feel alive in every cell of my being. When I lead a workshop for a group of women, I’m totally engaged and feel like I’m in my element. Women’s groups are my jam. And I get to lead them for a living. It’s awesome.
And that’s when I realized. Maybe, for some of us, imposter syndrome is a sign.
A sign that we’re not doing the work we’re meant to be doing in the world. A sign that a part of us doesn’t belong. A sign that a part of us is not satisfied with the status quo, and is wanting something more.
What if you don’t feel like you belong because a part of you secretly wants to be doing something else entirely?
Start by asking yourself; “hmmm, is there a part of me that is doing xxx (this job, getting my PhD, etc.) because I think I should, or to prove myself to others?”
And then ask yourself; “hmmm, what does my heart and intuition want? What part of me am I ignoring that wants to be doing something else?” Get to know that part of you and follow it’s desires more.
If you aren’t sure how to do this, here are 9 steps to create work you love.
If you follow your heart and intuition, your soul’s path, chances are some or all of your Imposter Syndrome will go away. I know mine did. (To be clear, I still struggle with self-doubt, but it feels very different from the imposter syndrome I had when working in finance.)
Let me know in the comments if you’ve experienced imposter syndrome, and what you did about it.
And, learn some simple steps to create work you love HERE.