Think you can't date a younger man? Think again. Here are five fabulous reasons to date younger -- and love every minute of it!
Reason 1: He loves your experience.
Your experience is valuable, whether you're 35 or 45 or 65. And what a man your own age may view as "baggage," a younger guy sees as fascinating territory you've traveled -- and you're willing to share.
Think of all the things you two can discuss and you can take the lead and enjoy being the mentor. Everything from the business world to the books you read, and the pleasures you care to indulge in during private moments.
He's the beneficiary of your lessons and your humor, and yes, that experience applies to the way you handle yourself in bed.
Reason 2: He's open-minded.
Sure, we all tend to grow more opinionated as we get a little older, and some of us are young at heart and open-minded forever. But we may be more likely to find an enthusiastic cheerleader and non-judgmental partner in a person who is on the younger side.
Stuck on trying those tango lessons that your ex refused to consider? Chances are, your younger man is game. Dying to hike the Pacific Northwest or finally start your own consulting firm? He won't be a naysayer; he'll admire your talent and determination.
Reason 3: They're hot!
No offense intended to the mature gentlemen we all know (and love), but younger guys are happy to take a tumble at any time of day or night -- not just for scheduled Saturday Night Sex. And that's hot!
From a sexuality standpoint, many say that a younger man and older woman are a better fit, though this depends on the couple, of course. But consider this: You may want to explore in ways you never felt comfortable when you were younger. He may be more than willing to do so... with enthusiasm. You may want to make up for lost time after a less than monumental marital sex life. He may be more than delighted to oblige.
Reason 4: His attitude and energy are (happily) infectious.
Whenever I've dated younger -- anywhere from 5 to 10 years -- I found that an upbeat attitude and adventurous nature to encourage precisely the same in me. The result? I ventured more, I accomplished more, and I relished all of it. A younger man helped me live more in the moment, and also look forward, at a time when I needed that upturn in optimism.
Naturally, a vibrant approach to each day can be present at any age. But if we've been dealing with hardship or have gone through tough times, a more youthful outlook can be invigorating.
Reason 5: If you know what you want, he's likely up to the task.
In any relationship, it's critical to know what you want. Are you looking for something casual? Are you hoping for something long-term? Are you in transition and aware of that fact -- looking to experiment and explore?
Fireworks in bed are not a factor of age, but of attraction and emotional bonding. Belief systems and values have little to do with the year of your birth. A 40-year-old woman with a 5-year-old may find she has everything in common with a 30-year-old man with a 5-year old. A 55-year-old woman may find a passionate and attentive lover in a 38-year-old.
When a couple wants different things -- at any age -- that's where you run into challenges.
What else matters when dating a younger man?
Some of the reasons a younger man will love spending time with you:
- Confidence: You know who you are, responsibility doesn't scare you, and self-assurance is sexy -- don't forget it!
When dating a younger man, so be sensitive to the feelings of your children, and don't forget that individual circumstances are likely to come into play. A five-year age difference may be a non-event. 10 years? Unimportant if you're 34 and he's 24, or if you're 70 and he's 60. Isn't it really about maturity?
Certainly, an age difference matters if it's significant enough that the biological clock comes into play. If he's 30 and wants kids -- but you're 40 and done -- you have an impasse on your hands unless other options are open.
So if you know he wants a family and you do not (or cannot), isn't that a deal breaker -- even if you're the same age?
Signs the age gap is a problem:
Pay attention to signs that the age gap is a problem. Here are a few clues that indicate you may have bitten off too significant a difference:
- You long for more intellectual stimulation.
- The interaction is making you feel older rather than good about yourself.
- You hope for more than a sexual relationship, but you cannot socialize with his friends -- or yours.
Otherwise? Don't knock it until you've tried it. Be yourself, be aware of who you're with and what you want, set your expectations accordingly and enjoy!