Five Films Marina Abramovic and Lars Von Trier Should Make Together

Yesterday we learned that Marina Abramovic publicly solicited Lars Von Trier to aid her in the creation of “Seven Deaths,” a multi-part film that will chronicle the demise of seven opera singers, with each segment to be helmed by a different director. In her video plea, which she released via Sweden’s public service channel SVT, Abramovic addressed Von Trier directly: “You really bring the actors on the edge of complete nervous breakdowns,” she said. “Because I am a performance artist, I understand very well what you are doing.” Indeed, Von Trier is likely no stranger to performance art, what with speculation that his bombastic press conference statements are more put-on than, say, actual unbridled misogyny; it seems theirs is a match made in a particularly washed-out, unflinching heaven. So, in anticipation of what ought to be the beginning of a beautiful partnership, we’ve dreamed up a few other projects that the dynamic duo might take on.