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The toddler took off his pants, opened the patio door, and threw them outside shouting “no!”— Eric Smith (@ericsmithrocks) January 12, 2021
May we all live this boldly.
I couldn’t decide if I wanted bangs or not so I cut bangs for my daughter and she looks awful. Dodged a bullet there.— Mom Jeans (@momjeansplease) January 14, 2021
My 9yo just told me:— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) January 12, 2021
Thank you, Catherine Obvious.
I’m not correcting her.
nothing more horrifying as a parent to see a child that has fallen asleep at five pm— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 13, 2021
My 7 year old just showed me how she can wink. With both eyes. At the same time.— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) January 12, 2021
I just made my daughter a grilled cheese and her response was “this is perfect, I bet you can’t do it twice” so yes, she knows how to play the game— Crockett🍀 (@CrockettForReal) January 14, 2021
Me: I thought you said you were taking these boxes to the garage— Not the Nanny (@not_thenanny) January 13, 2021
My Husband: Yeah, at some point
Our 7 YO, from the other room: That means she wants you to do it now!
son: was I adopted?— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) January 14, 2021
me: not yet
Explaining to my kids that before the internet you’d have to write a 3-pg paper from a 3-sentence Encyclopedia entry— Lil Bit 🌈 (@LizerReal) January 11, 2021
If you hate someone, give their kid a violin.— Annie the Nanny (@AnnietheNanny1) January 14, 2021
ME: you need to put on a jacket— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) January 10, 2021
MY KID: [frozen in a block of ice] but i’m not even cold
My daughter went back to college today and I texted her that I missed her so much and she texted back 2.5 hours later, “Yes.” Then, “Sorry, that wasn’t for you.”— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) January 11, 2021
I WAS IN LABOR FOR 14 HOURS
Once, my husband and I drove on a steep cliff face on only a gravel path, and it left us scarred for awhile, because all we could think of is how things would be disastrous with one wrong move.— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) January 10, 2021
Anyway this is what moving across the country with two small kids is like help
“My heart will hurt if you don’t read me another book”— Satirical Mommy (@MommySatirical) January 10, 2021
My 5yo perfecting the guilt trip
My 2yo pointed at the octopus in the book we were reading and called it dada if any of you were wondering how attractive I am in real life— Average Dad (@Average_Dad1) January 9, 2021
My son is on guitar, my daughters are on drums and harmonica, and I'm on my second ibuprofen.— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) January 14, 2021
If you've ever eaten your Three Year Old's pancake because it wasn't Mickey Mouse enough, I see you I am you.— My Life Is The Pitts Family (@LifePitts) January 10, 2021
My youngest has mastered telling the dog to sit.— A Bearer Of Dad News🇬🇾 (@HomeWithPeanut) January 15, 2021
Now, he's working on his older brother.
I just told the 4yr old to lick her elbow and bought myself five minutes of quiet.— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) January 14, 2021